A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Ok where do I start. My ex (which has been my friend for the past 10 years)and I will be broken up for almost 2 years. We were together for 5. Now, he calls me about once a week. He's moved on, living with her and her daughter. Me on the other hand... I have completely let myself go. I cry all the time. I still love him as much today as I did 7 years ago. I day dream about him. He's constantly on my mind. I don't know what to do. I'm miserable... and I have a 6 year old daughter and he was there to see her grow up until she was 4 almost 5. So she still talks about him all the time. I'm heart broken!! And I don't understand why he had no problem moving on...I can't even get a grip! What do I do? How do I get over him?
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male
reader, leonard j.Douglas  +, writes (10 August 2007):
You know how to work your computer,and you also know that what you put into it is what you'll get out of it. You have the finest computer between your ears, your "BRAIN". And what you feed into your brain is what you'll get out of it. You can learn to control your brain by feeding it positive information,like who needs an EX? I'm not going to let him get me down, nor am I going to feel miserable just because of him. And I can, and will, make it on my own. So what you are doing is Programming you brain for failure, by all of that negative feed-back going to your brain. He can move on because he has been able to reprogram his Mental-Computer. You can also do the same if you want to do so. It's Called,NLP-"NEURO-LINGUISTIC-PROGRAMMING".(AND ALL SUCCESS IS BASED ON THE MENTAL-IMAGERY) oF one's goals or wants in life.
A
female
reader, sexi  +, writes (10 August 2007):
 Hi, you need to be strong for your daughter's sake. If he has moved on you should too (as hard as it may sound). You need to go out and meet other people and that way you are sure to find some that would be worthy of your love. There is definately someone out there that deserves you as it is clear the other guy doesnt. Hang in there everything would work out for the better.Take care,mail me if you wanna talk
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A
female
reader, dragonfly13  +, writes (10 August 2007):
I know how hard it must be I've just recently split from my b/f of 4yrs following the miscarriage of our baby amongst other things. You've been split for 2yrs now and your still hurting, have you told him how you feel? If telling him how you feel is'nt a good idea then maybe it's time you focus on your daughter and start enjoying life. Find yourself a hobby, join a club.I know it sounds harsh but at the moment you seem to be dwelling on the past, which is such an easy thing for people to do. Remind yourself that the relationship must have finished for a reason and don't dress the past up fantasing it to be better than it actually was. In time time things will get better but only if you allow them to.
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A
male
reader, Karlos Omnis +, writes (10 August 2007):
 First things first, you have to WANT to stop thinking of him, that passage struck me that in a weird way you like to be reminiscing about him.Second you can't stop thinking, so you need to find something to occupy your thoughts, get a hobby with your daughter, try a new activity that you never performed with your ex so you can't think "it was better when he did it with us".Thirdly, and you probably won't like this, him calling you every week clearly isn't doing you any favours. If you never stopped being in contact with one another then you really never had time to heal. I'm not saying that you should never contact him again, but you should have a break from hearing from him.Hope that helps
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (10 August 2007): If you want to get over him you have got to stop talking to him. Did he initiate the break up? Cause if he did there's not much you can do about it. You have to move on one way or another. And if not for yourself do it for your daughter. She probably misses him in part because she sees you so sad without him. If you were happy and out and about and had lots of friends and lots going on and showed her a great life and a great new you without him by your side, I am sure she would not be so torn. She'd be too busy having a great life to think about it. Guaranteed. You HAVE to stop feeling sorry for yourself. Obviously he is not that great. I mean he moved on without a problem. He is not worth another tear from you. He is just not. You don't see him crying. Knowing that alone should give you enough drive to say "F*ck this! I deserve better! I'm NOT going to waste another day being miserable over someone who doesn't even care." Save all of that love you have for someone who will love you back, who can't live without you, who will go to all ends to be with you. Not for him. He's not worth it. And your daughter deserves a happy mom.
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