A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend can't let go..about a year ago i knew a guy and we were talkin but just as friends i knew this guy from school and i told my boyfriend about him then he heared from a friend that im cheating on him with this guy though i never did this and we broke-up Now we`re back together but he still cant believe that i did nothing with that other guy. He cant trust me anymore i really thought of leaving him but the problem is that i slept with him and im not a virgin anymore and here in Egypt you can't tell that you`re not a virgin!! This is not the only reason im with him of course i do love him but i know love is not enough for a relationship to work but being not a virgin is a huge problem thats why i cant leave him.I'm really so confused and depressed so what can i do to gain his trust again or should i leave him?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (8 December 2007): You dont need to earn any trust back, you didnt do anything wrong. He has major trust issues.
As for the virgin problem, as long as your not both at the same place every day (school, university, work), then you could easily not see him again.
If he broke up with you and has lost trust in you when youve done nothing, then the same could happen in future, sounds like a shaky foundation for a relationship.
A
male
reader, Trying Hard  +, writes (2 December 2007):
I would consider moving on. You are young enough, and there are not kids, so you might want to end the situation. It may take years, many years to gain the trust back, so unless you are willing to live with this going on in the background for a long time you should get over it now. Learn from the situation and start fresh....
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A
female
reader, beanie0216 +, writes (1 December 2007):
 Do people know that you are not a virgin? If not, do not be with him. I had a similar situation,and it's not fair to you. That is what youdid in your pastand no one needs to know that but you. I made a similar mistake of him pressuring me into telling him everything i did with guys. Its not fair to us. Whatever you did before you were with him he shouldn't care about and if he does then he's not the right person for you. He should love you for who you are now and what you are doing now not before. You CAN leave him. Who tells you you CAN'T leave him, your government? I don't understand that. If you want explain it more to me. But you want to be happy and if there is no trust there can't be a healthy relationship. Good Luck, if there is anything else I can do for you let me know.
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