| A
female
,
anonymous
writes: I'm a 25 single mum of 2 and always dated men no older than 32. I have now met a 38 year old man who I've fallen in love with, and him me. But the problem I have is I don't think my family will accept the age difference and don't know what to do for the best. He wants to be open about our feelings for each other which I agree with, but I don't want the hassle I will get from my family. What should I do? Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 August 2005): If this man is good to you and your children then, friend, you are BETTER OFF than with a younger man.
Older men are more likely to know what they want from life. They usually have steadier jobs and better incomes. They are more realistic about the practical issues of life, children, etc.
I made the mistake, also with two kids, of dating younger men. It did not work out, they did not realize the practical issues of adult life, especially chlidren and finances, and not being able to just go out when you feel like it.
I'm 28 now, my husband is 41 and going out with him was the best decision I ever made both for me and my children.
Good luck!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (2 August 2005): At 25, with two children it's highly likely you do possess the responsible, mature attitude to know exactly what you want in life. Raising family is a huge job and it requires common sense and insights, many women your age don't have.
Which is why you prefer the company of a more older, wiser man who is basically at the same level maturity in life as you are.
I would stay with this guy if he's wonderful, honest and good to you and your kids. After all, you are a package deal and many men his age understand and accept this. Your parents are lke;y just reacting to the stigma attached to age-gap relationships that society places on others who experience this love. At your age and with the life experience under your belt, I see nothing wrong with this.
I have problems with teen schoolgirls dating much older men because that type of relationship is creepy. I question the older guy, who has to go after naive teen girls when there are so many lovely (25 plus)women are out there for him to share an equally balanced mature, loving relationship with. But this is not the case with you.
You and he should sit with your parents and have a discussion with them on this issue. Be honest,open and forthright. Give your parents the opportunity to get to know him for "who he really is"...they may find themselves really liking him. Tell your folks you love them but you don't need their approval anymmore on whom you should date. After all, you are a single, independent woman who can make decisons based on what's best for yourself and your kids. Your parents need to trust you and have faith in your life decisions. I think they will accept him...but just give it time.
Good luck with this and stay strong
...............................
A
female
reader, Helen05 +, writes (2 August 2005):
You are 25 years old and a mother of two and you are letting your family dictate who you should have a relationship with? Follow your heart and if you truly love this man and he treats you well they will see this.
You say that you don't know for sure if your family will accept the age difference. could it be that you are using this as an excuse to avoid getting hurt? Give your family a chance, and this man. I hope things work out for you.
...............................
|
