A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Hi everybody! I was in love with someone for the last one year and 8 months. As the time went, our relation become fade due to the followig reasons : She was racist and i tried to change her attituds towards racism, but she could't change and finally our relationship discontinued. She has also another behavior that is approahing male friend openly and as a result a lot of guy asked her for love affairs . I told her many times to avoid or to reduce this behavior but she couild't. What i want to say finally is that was it right decsion to quit with her. To take this action i have tried all my best thank you in advancebye bye
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female
reader, Sweet-thing  +, writes (8 November 2007):
 I think the two things you described about your relationship are both big issues. How can you love someone who is prejudice against you because of your race, background, or color? Love should be blind to these things. The second thing you mentioned was the fact that she was too friendly with other men, which gave them a green light to assume she was available. I suspect she's a slightly insecure person who needs the attention and validation that comes from having offers. Since you pointed it out to her and she did nothing to change her behavior, that shows a lack of respect toward you. I think you were smart for ending the relationship. You cannot build a life with someone who doesn't love you blindly, or respect you. Good luck.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 November 2007): you cant change anybody for the better no matter how hard you try you may shed a light on them somewhat but other then that its only possible to change if the want to change and she may not have wanted to change
and if it desturbed you that much why did you stay with her that long did you really love her or did you just lust after her --because if you were in love with here you could have set those differencses aside and and if your realy confused abot it being a right or wrong choice ask her and if you couldent set the differences aside did you try and confront her about these problems one on one..
and if she really loved you then she would not agree to those affairs -- also just because shes open with these guys does not mean anything will happen - plenty of girls will be open with guys cus there friends and if she were open wth a girl like that you would have no problem ...
so if you think you ade the wrong choice sit her down and talk to her
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A
female
reader, Minelisse  +, writes (8 November 2007):
 Nobody is perfect! Girls you meet will always have something you don't like, whether or not you can deal with them is the real issue. If racism and flirtation are two characteristics you could definitely not deal with or if there were other "little stuff" going on, then you made the right choice.
If, however, she is girlfriend number 6 and the previous ones were dumped because of hair color, politics views and/or crying during soap operas, you might need to evaluate the common factor in all your relationships which is you!
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A
female
reader, XxAngelDust89xX  +, writes (8 November 2007):
 If you belive that you made the right descion then you did.
your ex seems to have a few issues that she needs to sort out, and maybe it is best that you two are apart. If you asked her to change/work on something that reallly truly bothered you and she made no effort then maybe she wasnt all that committed to the relationship.
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