A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I broke up with my boyfriend of a year and a few months two nights ago... At the time it seemed like the right thing to do. We were at the point in our relationship were we should either move forward or split and neither of us were ready to move forward. I'm really regretting my decision though. I talked to him and we might go on dates, but not as boyfriend and girlfriend. It would be like at the beginning of a relationship. We pretty much just jumped into our relationship without going on dates first, so maybe this will help us know if we should be together? I miss him so much and I really feel like I made a mistake. I switched my birth control method last month and I'm wondering if this could have impacted my emotions and therefore my decision? I miss him. I don't know what to do. ANY advice would be greatly appreciated!
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female
reader, Jennilove +, writes (3 April 2010):
It is very important that you remember the reasons for your split in the first place: things weren't moving forward. It is natural that you might feel a bit lonely after a split - *everyone* does - but that's not a good reason to go back to this person.
I say this because I was in a very similar position to you. My boyfriend and I were headed nowhere in the relationship and we had 'jumped in' without dates too. Its no good trying to keep working on things; i'm sure you have been trying already - a relationship doesnt just break up over night.
This is a time for you to be a strong woman and remind yourself of all the things you will look forward to when you get over your break up. Surround yourself with good friends, have as much fun as you can, try not to think too much about your boyfriend and feeling lonely. Whenever you do feel sad and lonely - remind yourself of the reasons why you split up. You wanted better. Good luck!!
A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (3 April 2010):
No one is perfect and to err is only human .
If you think you have made a mistake , be humble enough and admit to him and apologize to him to mend your relationship .
Wipe your slate clean and start all over again.
If you are destine to be together, nothing will come in between you two.
In the second round , you will be more matured and experience.
All the best to you !
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (3 April 2010):
You said you were at the point where you either had to split or move forward, and neither of you were ready to move forward. You made the right decision. And now you're going out to date him again? Not a good idea, because nothing will suddenly change, and you'll be right back here. It wasn't working because neither of you are ready to make it work. You need to end it and move on from him. I think you're only really going back because you're lonely. Your birth control has nothing to do with this. You made a clear decision that things were not moving forward, and you split. Now you are making the bad, emotional decision to go back. Nothing will change. You need to end it and cut contact. Or you'll spend the next ten years repeating this decision over and over every time it doesn't work.
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