A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:me and my boyfriend broke up a few months ago, within that time i talked to a guy i had only kissed before (years ago) just catch up, what have you been up to etc my bf then hacked into my facebook and read the messages between us. this didnt really bother me as they wernt bad, but it annoyed me that we were broken up (his choice) and he went onto my account. so he rang me up calling me a fucking lying slut etc said some HORRIFIC things... anyway a few weeks went by,he started seeing a therapist and we decided to give it another go.and now the problem is with me talking to that guy on FB. he says i cheated on him. he says i was chatting him up (which i know i wasnt) that i wanted something more with him and i betrayed my bf. i dont know what to do! he is stressing n this everyday! he wont let me forget it. was i wrong to talk to the guy on FB?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (24 July 2009): sure NOT
it's not wrong at all .. u BROKE UP with ur bf ur FREE !!
A
male
reader, Rogerramjet  +, writes (24 July 2009):
You definitely weren't wrong to talk to a guy on facebook! For goodness sakes, you were broken up! So that's point 1 in your favour that it was really no business of his who you talk to.
Point 2 is that it doesn't sound like it was really anything outside of innocent probing to see what was out there.
I think it's good that your bf is seeing a therapist. It sounds like he needs it!
All you can do is reassure him that, if you're together, you won't be talking to that guy again...
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A
female
reader, Alexiedos  +, writes (24 July 2009):
 No you werent wrong i do it all the time and my boyfriend knows about this. However i can understand why he would be feeling like you cheated, he has paranoia and its probably made worse that he split with you and then realised he'd made a mistake and now cant take it back. He may be blaming himself but cannot successfully do that to himself so he puts all his anger onto you because its easier, he needs to realise that the past is the past and he needs to forgive himself and move on.
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