A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Told a guy he was too busy to date - was I unreasonable?I met a guy online (He's 35, I'm 30) and we exchanged a few emails but he would always take a couple of days to reply, saying he was really busy. Not a problem really, but it does colour my later opinion.Anyway, we met for coffee and he seemed really nice and texted me afterwards to say we should to it again sometime. I replied back that it was great to meet him, I'd love to and he should call me.I didn't hear anything for 2 weeks and just chalked it up to experience.Then he texts out of the blue on a monday night, 2 weeks later, asking if I wanted to meet up that thursday. I replied asking how he was and saying that I was sorry, I had family staying for the week but if Thursday was a good day, how about we do it the following week?Again, no reply for a week and a half.Then, Wednesday of the following week, the day before my proposed reschedule, he texts me back saying he's sorry, he lost track of text messages, he busy tonmorrow night now, but maybe the weekend?I replied that it seemed like he had a lot going on right now and I wasn't sure he really had time to date?He came back with "Fair enough, but I think I can judge that thank you. Good luck with life." So that's definitely it, but was I rude, or was I justified in saying that?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2012): It is just one guy off a dating site. What`s the big deal? It`s not like you have been his first choice out of them all anyhow.
A
female
reader, CindyCares  +, writes (7 November 2012):
 Rude, why ? you simply know what you want ( a guy who has , or makes, time for you ) and you told him that, in fact very diplomatically, ( maybe even too diplomatically according to my personal tastes ) -in order to save you both misunderstandings and waste of time. Which is , in fact, considerate.
If he answered so miffed ... I think maybe it was because he had counted on you to be more compliant and meekly let him string you along , while he is all wraooed up into his " busy " life.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2012): No I don't think you were rude at all, he was.
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A
female
reader, Staceily  +, writes (7 November 2012):
 Not rude at all, quite justified. I'm glad he moved on since he clearly wasn't all that interested and now you have freedom to meet someone who is. No one on earth is too busy to send an email or text for 2 weeks. And if by some weird circumstance they were then they certainly shouldn't be dating.
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A
male
reader, somewhere_between +, writes (7 November 2012):
 He was just a guy off a dating site. You are a girl off a dating site. You are both 10 a penny and can both move on to the next ones.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2012): He probably finds the time to date lots of women and you just got bottom billing. Better to get rid of him now.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (7 November 2012):
 I think it was just fine... I think he really was TOO busy to date or just not really all that interested.
And I think his answer was more rude then your question to be honest.
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A
female
reader, oldbag +, writes (7 November 2012):
 Hi
He didn't seem overkeen anyways so yes you were definately justified in saying what you did. He was far too vague,mardy and unavailable.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (7 November 2012): Hey, the guy was making literally no effort and let you know by his response he was not going to step it up. What choice did you have? From what I've read, he didn't seem too keen in the first place.
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