A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey, just wanted to clear my mind about something which happened last week.I went clubbing for the first time in the city last Friday (I've gone clubbing in my local town before, but I generally just have a drink and talk to friends there as opposed to dancing/meeting strangers). Anyway, I was mostly talking to a guy I'd just met at a film gala which my friends were at, and one of my other male friends. Anyway, got to dancing and a girl caught my eye and introduced herself on the dance floor. I couldn't catch her name after like four attempts cos of the loud music, but I did hear her she told me which course she was on at uni, and in which year. Anyway, I'm pretty awkward (hadn't even kissed before this) so she said, "You're staring" with a smile. This led to her taking my hands and us dancing a bit, which was awkward in a way, but I was just enjoying myself too much to care. Then she leaned into my for a kiss, which led to ten minutes or so of making out on the dance floor. I got into it straight away, every fear of the awkward first kiss out of the window. Tongues, gentle lip biting, grinding and I occasionally moved to her neck which she seemed to enjoy. Anyway, after those 10 minutes she broke away with a smile and told me she had to go for 5 minutes but she'd be back. I wasn't sure if she went into the bathroom or what. Anyway, I started to feel guilty cos a girl I'd been flirting with a lot for a couple of months was there also who I had a good amount of feelings for. Although I regret it now, after waiting like 10 minutes without seeing the girl return, I went outside for a while to phone a friend. Drunk, I texted the girl I had been flirting with to talk to me outside for a bit. I said I'd done something stupid -- amusingly, I was DOING something stupid by sending that text. She didn't come outside because she didn't want to end the night on a serious note (we're still getting on, although things are cooler between us now in a way).Anyway. I did bump into the girl from the dancefloors friend, who asked me if I'd seen her again. I hadn't. And now I wonder about her. Did she not come back because she wasn't that into me after all? Had she gotten tied up somewhere in a line waiting for something or another and I was a total jerk for not waiting around longer? I already know texting the other girl was a mistake, and I apologised, but this is sort of sticking in my mind. Was I fine to leave to do other things after she took over 5 minutes more than she said she would?[Mod note: despite the flag choice, the question originates in the UK.]
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (27 May 2011):
You walked away, so she must have thought you weren't bothered. If someone says wait, then wait more than just 5 minutes. Especially if it's a woman you like! The women in my life are always late, so I take the time they say they'll be (5 mins), and times it by 3 (so they'll take 15 mins) - I've never been wrong.
A
female
reader, adamantine  +, writes (27 May 2011):
 Well.. back in my days of hook ups, if a guy left as soon as I went to the bathroom, or went to say hello to someone, I'd know he's only in it for the pussy. I guess it is sometimes a way of testing the man (not necessarily though, I didn't do it all the time ;])
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