A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes: I was at a party and there was a guy who is interested in me.. maybe love me. I like him but not in the way that he does for me. He hasn't told me directly that he does and I never asked. However he wanted to dance with me and not in a good way. Its more like grinding heavily on a girl type of dance. I am not a fan of dancing and I told him so. For the rest of the night, he was grinding on other women, whispering in their ears and then the women and him would look at me and smile.Is he trying to make me jealous? Because that won't work. At the end of the night he seemed disappointed and I couldnt lift his spirit so I told his brother to tell him that I am sorry. His brother then told me that he told him but he said nothing. WHY didn't HE SAY SOMETHING?
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2015): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks everyone for your help .
A
female
reader, Ciar +, writes (13 July 2015):
Why are you apologizing to this guy?
You're sorry you didn't engage in something you didn't like just to spare his feelings? Stop apologizing, for Pete's sake. It makes you look weak and foolish. Besides, it's not as if he's crying himself to sleep at night. He might be interested in you but I would hardly call it a crush let alone love.
Nevermind analyzing him. He's predictable and boring and you're not interested anyway.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2015): He doesn't love you. He barely knows you, he might fancy you and think he can get you into bed but love is a whole lot more than that. It certainly sound's like he wanted to make you feel like he could have any woman at that party, he sounds like a complete dick head. If he was interested in you, and you declined to dance then he might have chatted to you, had some drinks together and been a whole lot more sociable and kind. You can do better.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 July 2015): Is that what men do these days? In my days if a guy grinded(is grinding what I think it is) to a woman in public and she wasn't his wife or GF he would get a slap in the face.If that is the norm these days, then you should forget it.
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A
female
reader, Anonymous 123 +, writes (12 July 2015):
Oh OP...he doesn't love you or even have the slightest respect for you. Love isn't petty, its not about making the other person jealous, its not vain or selfish or calculated.
Its a good thing if you say you aren't interested in him. Why bother about him? He doesn't seem like the kind of person who you should be with anyway!
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A
female
reader, janniepeg +, writes (11 July 2015):
Love does not start off by grinding someone's butt. Most people in parties are after a fun time and nothing more. There is nothing to be sorry about. Maybe he was disappointed because the other girl did not leave with him to go to his place. He did not respond because he was not looking for a friend, just a quick lay, or just some girl to grind. When you told him you were not interesting in dancing he thought you were rejecting him. He got another girl to dance with to show that he's wanted. It's not your job to lift his spirit. If things get awkward because he didn't get to grind you then his interest can't be that deep.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (11 July 2015):
Was he trying to make you jealous? I doubt it, he just wanted to dance and have fun..
You think this guy.. MAY even love you, but you don't feel the same way - SO stop wondering why he does what he does. You aren't interested, good... let him do this thing. Maybe grinding with other women made HIM feel special.
I think you "protest" a little too much on how you don't like him, because if he was busy grinding and whispering, yet still caught you LOOKING... then you are not so "uninterested" as you claim.
And WHY on earth is it YOUR job to "life this guy's spirits"? Or to apologize for "not being able to"?
I don't get it.
YOU are ALLOWED to not like him THAT way.
HE is ALLOWED to dance with other girls, flirt and check and see if he gets a reaction from you... That is his problem, not yours.
And no he doesn't "love" you... he might crush on you, infatuated with you, or interested in you.. that is not love..
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