A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend and I split up a few months ago. We'd been together just short of a year.With hindsight, I was just wondering if the demise of our relationship had something to do with him not being over his ex, and him not knowing it.He was with his ex 4 years. There was a 4 month gap, then me and him got together. With us, it was like instant intimacy and being comfortable with each other. I thought it might be because we were friends before, but maybe I think he tried to re-create the same closeness he had with his ex girlfriend.He wasn't with anyone in that 4 month gap, apart fropm a one night stand with his ex whixh she initiated and he regretted.Do you think he left enough time between his ex and me, to get over her? Do you think this is why we split up?
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female
reader, hlskitten +, writes (9 March 2008):
 Hi
Possibly was to do with the ex. If he has slept with her since, or been out with her, then the connection was obviously still there, otherwise why would he have been round there again.
4 months is a fair amount of time, and if you hadnt said he's seen her since you split i wouldnt of thought much of it.
But ive been there and done that and bought the t shirt. Hassle from their ex when i was with them, me having a feeling there was still some feelings there, him denying it, us splitting, whatya know within 2 weeks hes slept with her again. Twice.
Needless to say they didnt get back together though. But no one sleeps with an ex without there being something there. Its not like its a stranger they use for a one nighter that they just met when out clubbing.
C xxxxxx
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (9 March 2008):
 A breakup is a breakup. There is no sense in knowing the whys.It could be or it could be other reasons.
If you are not meant for each other , you will have to move on.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (9 March 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionShe was a presence throughout our relationship (she wanted him back and would text/call often) and I know they have beenin contact and met up once since our split...
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A
female
reader, SmashedBrain  +, writes (9 March 2008):
If there was a four month gap then most likely he was over the relationshup with his ex and he was ready to start something new with you. The only way it would have something to do with his past relationship is if he more recently have been associating or catching up with his ex, an then he might have resparked the interest. But the odds of that are slim. I don't think the break up had anything to do with his past relationship.
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