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Trust broken again with on-line chat

Tagged as: Cheating, Gay relationships, Online dating, Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 July 2007) 1 Answers - (Newest, 25 July 2007)
A male United States age , *omguy writes:

Trust broken again with on-line chat.

My partner of 2.5 years has a problem. He's addicted to the internet, chat rooms, e-mails,etc. I discovered this last year when I found very sexual messages he saved from people he was communicating with on-line. He thought it wasn't cheating cause there was no physical contact. He also admitted to having phone sex with some of them. I was of course devestated and we had it out. I ended up leaving. I asked him to get professional help and he said he wouldn't do it anymore since he realized it was damaging our relationship. Well I discovered he's at it again. He contacted some guy he responded to over Craigs List and is using a pseudo name. There is nothing sexual in the communications (yet) but my partner has brought up several times about wanting to meet face to face. Each time, however, my partner backs down and claims he's too busy during the week and maybe they can meet next week. I didn't confront him with what I know because I felt like I want to see just how far he will take this. But last night I had a restless sleep thinking about it. I thought maybe he is playing some kind of stupid game and I'm making a big deal of nothing. I'm so disappointed in him.

I just don't know what to do. I'm just kind of numb right now and I'm trying to comprehend why he does such things. He acts as though there is nothing wrong. He must get some high off of pretending he is someone else. I'm afraid of things escalating. I don't want to contract any disease because of his stupidity.

Should I call him on it? If so, I think the consequences are that I will probably leave for good. That makes me sad.

Thanks,

Tom

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A male reader, DJ8433 United States +, writes (25 July 2007):

DJ8433 agony auntYou should have trusted your first instinct. You obviously can't live like this and he's not going to change. You know what you need to do, now just do it.

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