A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi everyone. I could use some help. I'm having difficulty getting over a rejection from this summer. There was this girl I really liked, I mean really liked. She was/is everything I could ever want. She's extremely nice, caring, sweet, intelligent, not to mention beautiful. (Looks don't mean anything to me, but she was quite noticeable) Well, we saw each other around quite a bit around campus (college) and got to know each other decently. Every time I saw her, I completely froze. I constantly regretted never asking her out and just started to accept that I'd never see her again. Well, just when I think I'd never see her again, I ran into her. Personally, I thought it was like a sign or something. We ran into each other quite a bit, which became somewhat of a joke between us. I always made her laugh. We always made eye contact. She always seemed genuinely happy to see. Anyway, it turned she didn't like me at all. Not in the least bit. Not even as a friend. She hurt me, she insulted me, she lied to me, and so on. I don't think she realized how much she hurt me. My self-esteem and confidence virtually hit rock bottom because of her. I felt worthless, still do sometimes. And yet, I still like her. I still occasionally think about her. Just when she slips out of my mind, something comes back to remind me of her. I don't know why I feel like I do and I certainly can't explain it. Every indication says that she's a mean person or something, but I just don't believe it. I'm still so hurt even though it's been months, which is completely not like me. And it's not the first rejection in my life either. I've never had a girlfriend, never had a girl even like me, so I'm used to rejection. Granted, I'm skinny and shy, so that's my fault, but it still confuses me how nobody has ever liked me. I wish I could like apologize to her for bothering her. Why does this rejection hurt so much more than the others?
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male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (2 October 2009):
She's extrememly nice, caring and all that? Yet when you spoke to her, she insulted you, lied to you and such? I'd say that she wasn't all that great to be honest. So start with that. She wasn't the girl for you and she didnt' have much respect for you. You're at uni, so go out with your friends, join a class like acting or something where you can be around other people (men and women) and just start over. The right girl will come along. The one you asked out sounded like she was a bit up herself to be honest. You can do better. And don't apologize either! Also, I asked out 10 girls and they all said no. But number 11 said yes, so don't worry!
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