A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I am getting too old for these games…About 3 months ago I noticed this good looking security guard where I worked. We barely exchanged words, just the odd nod and hi whenever we crossed paths. As we got familiar with each other, I noticed that whenever he would look at me, he would give a close lipped smile and then look down. (Not a good indication by far.) He is the type that is arrogant. He comes across as thinking he can get any girl he wants. Unfortunately, I still am attracted to this type. The older I get, I am still drawn to these men. So I went away for a few weeks, and when I got back to work I noticed that he was not there anymore. Eventually, curiosity got the better of me and I asked one of the guys I know, that knows him, where he was. Naturally his question was, “Why are you asking? Do you like him?”Me, “No, I think he thinks he’s too good looking. Just wondering as I haven’t seen him around…”A week later – out of the blue – he’s back and acting all weird around me. When I walk into work – he looks at me – I pretend he’s not there, because I am so embarrassed that I asked about him. The other day I walked up to him and asked for his boss because she and I have an understanding and he was quite cocky towards me…. Very smart ass in his comebacks. He enjoyed being an ass to me.I was quite disgusted in his behaviour. I wanted to reach across the desk and smack that smirk off his face.Ever since that incident a few days ago I have been ignoring him. That behaviour was uncalled for. He was just rude. I know I was difficult – he was rude. Now that I am totally ignoring him, he watches me. The other day, he watched me walk up a street toward him – I noticed him looking at me from a distance away. As I turned to head into the building, he turned and walked toward me. I greeted his friend who was at the door and ignored him.I know what I am doing is wrong. I am too old to be playing these games. I don’t know how to turn back time. So, yeah I have to live with the fact that I asked about him. He thinks I like him. And to an extent, I think he’s hot. But personality wise – we have nothing in common. We aren’t even on the same wavelength. We aren’t even opposites. There is nothing between us that will ever connect. But, I need to know how to revert the situation. Any tips?Do I continue ignoring him until he gets bored and forgets about me? Or do I revert back to being professional – how I was before any of this started – the odd nod now and again until this all goes away - General acknowledgement? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (22 June 2012):
 I agree with BondGirl.
If you are AWARE of your own behavior, modify it. You are at work so the "being professional" would be the right approach. If he is not someone you want to date or spend time with outside of work, treat him with the SAME politeness you would other people you work with/around.
Whether he thinks you like him or not is irrelevant. He just works at the same place as you do, what he thinks... doesn't matter.
:shrug: just let it go and behave like a professional person.
A
female
reader, BondGirl72 +, writes (22 June 2012):
 If you are too old to play the game, then stop playing. You control what you do. If you're at work, I'd suggest you be completely professional to everyone at your job. If someone at your job gives you a hard time, ignore the person. It makes no difference whether he thinks you like him or not. He can go on thinking that for the next 20 years and it should mean absolutely nothing to you. I do know that smart-ass people at work can often cause problems that could lead to losing your job. I have dealt with this firsthand. I have never lost my job, but if it would have been up to someone else, I might have. My suggestion is mind your own business and do your job. If you don't have to speak to the guy, don't. Who cares what he thinks.
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