A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My best friend asked me to join her and a guy she is casually dating for a threesome. I am thinking about it because there are no feeling involved and maybe it could be a good idea to see what this is all about. Do you think I should do it? Would you girls do it when single and do you think it would be a good idea to do it with a friend?I am straight btw but the idea sounds fun..
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 July 2014): I would do it, as long as no one gets jealous. I'm married and my wife was not sure of doing this with my best friend but finally we did and now it happens often but always with respect. It's all about having fun sex. Good luck!
A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (6 April 2014):
 I wouldn't do it if she's a close friend. Sex and friendship doesn't mix, it changes things. Even if you are straight. Actually it might just make things very awkward since you're not attracted to her in that way.
I've had a threesome with two friends of mine, they were in a relationship. But they were not my closest and best of friends, so it was all good. I wouldn't do it if it was my best friend, or a friend I wanted in my life only as a friend for the time after. Because sex does change things.
You will get the chance of a threesome again, if that is what you want to try out. If this friendship isn't worth risking, then don't have sex with her (and her boyfriend).
I've been offered sex from friends previously, where I declined because I wanted to maintain the friendship. I know if I had jumped in bed with the women who offered me (female friends) then we wouldn't still be friends. Or, probably wouldn't be.
The couple I had a threesome with, we're still friends, sure. But we were never that close to begin with, and we're still not that close, so nothing has changed in that respect. We didn't live together in the same city, not that at point and not now either, so meeting frequently was never going to happen.
I think sex between friends is fine as long as you are all aware of the pro's and con's and respect each other (respect is very important here), and everyone involved know what is going to happen and don't add extra meaning to it. The boundaries need to be clear.
But if you're not bisexual, I don't really know what you will be getting out of this. For me though, I wasn't sexually attracted to my friends, it was more like just doing it for the experience, and they aren't unattractive, but I had no big desire to do it. So if they backed out, I wouldn't be too bothered either, which for me made it possible to go through with. If I had feelings involved, or was too interested in either of them, it'd probably not be a good idea as sex is intimacy, and intimacy can spark feelings.. If there's already a foundation for that.
If you do go through with it, I would advise you to not have intercourse with the man, or be on birth control in ADDITION to using a condom. When I had my threesome I did not have intercourse with my male friend because imagine the mess if I had gotten pregnant when he was in a relationship (engaged actually) to this other woman...
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (6 April 2014):
The thing is, she is casually dating this guy, so there are feelings for her somewhere. She may not think it a good idea now, but when you're having sex with this man she may not like it at all.
Personally, I think the only one that will wind up having a truly good time will be this guy. I think you and your friend could wind up discovering this isn't the best thing that could happen to your friendship.
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A
female
reader, Daisy_Daisy +, writes (6 April 2014):
 I think it's important to know whether this is coming from her or from him, and I'd place that it was his idea.
No I would not do this with a friend, or any one else. But especially not a friend.
Hopefully you say no, and you and your friend will look back at this in a few years time, saying "Remember when that jerk suggested the threesome? Thank God we said no!"
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (6 April 2014):
 How do you think your best friend is going to feel when she is left on the sidelines and the guy she is dating is going hell for leather giving you all he has got to give?
When you say there are no feelings involved, what about the feelings you have for her, your best friend, surely there is some platonic sisterly best friends type love that you wouldn't want to jeopardise.
You need to consider how strong your friendship is, and what the possible ramifications of this are, if the threesome does go pear shaped will your friendship survive.
Is the suggestion something she has thought up, or is she asking on behalf of the casual sex guy ...
Personally I would never hop into any sexual bed that has my best friend in it, introducing sex into our friendship would change the landscape of the friendship for ever, and I would not be prepared to take that risk.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 April 2014): I will never have a threesome, but I think there are strong feelings involved - your best friend. Not just friends, but best friends. Seeing her sex life up close and personal as well as getting sexually involved with her.... Can your friendship survive that?
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