A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I’m not sure where to start as I’m in complete shock at the moment. a while ago I joined a dating site to find myself a girlfriend as I’ve been single for nearly a year. came across a female who I liked and seem to get on well with each other. it didn’t lead to anything serious as a relationship and we just became good friends. since then she’s been boasting about how many men she’s been sleeping with and has in my opinion, rushed into relationships too soon with men. she actually agreed, she had done, but she keeps repeating the same pattern. as I messaged her on facebook, I just said hi, how was she? that kind of thing and then she told me, she was busy, and to leave her be. I find it odd because I haven’t done anything wrong and she’s treating me like dirt for no reason. I don’t know if it was her who blocked me and messaged me or her boyfriend? what should I do if she contacts me again out of the blue?
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 June 2019): she sounds like a nasty piece of work, you’re better off without her. she clearly isn’t adult enough and doesn’t understand how real life works.
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2019): I have yes, I’ve moved on already.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  +, writes (2 June 2019):
 OP, have you tried looking for someone to date who are around YOUR age and not.. much younger?
And don't fall for the "we can be friends" or " let's be friends and see if we want to date later". People generally know when they meet someone if they WANT to "invest" in that person and go on dates or... if they just don't see it happening. Her being 23 means she is probably a bit immature, and also cautious, She SUGGESTED friendship to let you down easy.
The whole "let's just be friends" doesn't MEAN that they ACTUALLY want a new friend. They think saying that is less "hurtful" than saying " I don't see us working out".
or "I'm not really interested".
Let it go. Block, delete and MOVE on.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 June 2019): I wasn’t having any luck, originally finding someone to date me, you’re right I was, then the female I was talking to, was only looking for friends, but she said if things changed she may go out with me. this was a lie in the end.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (1 June 2019): You said you were looking for a girlfriend; not a friend.
You're quite opinionated of her lifestyle; which is really of no consequence to you. You didn't say so; but I speculate you've voiced some opinion about it. Perhaps you've dropped a few hints in a subtle but roundabout way? Maybe she got your message. You don't really have to come right-out and say anything, sometimes your "tone" is enough.
Since you don't seem to approve of her sleeping around, and jumping into various relationships; you can simply block her and delete her from your contacts.
She's no longer interested friendship, if she's becoming belligerent. You need not waste any more time on her.
Move on!
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A
male
reader, Pepi let pew  +, writes (31 May 2019):
 She rushes into relationships to quick. She doesnt learn and keeps repeating the same mistake. She boasts about how many men she has been with. This woman is disgusting. Would you really want to build a relationship with someone everybody has used as a sex toy. This woman makes me feel sick. Where is her self respect..? You have been single for nearly a year. When it comes to dating you are the self respecting lion and she is the lost sheep. A lion should never concern himself with a sheep.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 May 2019): she’s twenty three
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A
female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (31 May 2019):
 This is one of those posts where I would dearly love to hear the other side of the story. I wonder what your ex friend would say to us if SHE was writing in.
I suspect it might be something along the lines of "I met a guy on a dating site. Had a few dates. Decided he wasn't right for me. I wanted to let him down gently so agreed to be friends. Tried to put him off contacting me by bragging about the number of men I was jumping into bed with as I knew he wouldn't approve. However, it didn't work and he kept in contact, telling me how I was rushing into relationships. Eventually ran out of patience with him telling me how to run my life and told him to leave me alone. Had to block him."
Does that sound at all plausible? It's what I SUSPECT happened. She got fed up of you giving your opinion. How she chooses to run her life is NOTHING TO DO WITH YOU. Her mistakes are HERS to make.
Regardless of whether I am right or wrong, she has made her choice and asked you to leave her be. You have no rights to stay in contact with her just because you assumed you two were friends. You MAY have been friends but friendships often run their course and one person decides to call a halt, such as in this case.
Make other friends and keep dating so you can find a lady who is right for you. This one was not a keeper.
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A
female
reader, Ivyblue +, writes (31 May 2019):
 Block, delete, move on
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (31 May 2019):
I don't think it was her BF.
Is she is your age, she is OLD enough to decide who she wants to keep in touch with, be friends with etc. Her BF isn't her "gate-keeper" - and IF he is... well, nothing you can do about that EITHER.
She told you to leave her be. PRESUME it was HER talking.
What's the point in keeping her contact info?
JUST block her, delete her number and un-friend her on social media. She WAS never a real friend.
Just waste your time and energy on someone like that. Seriously.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim +, writes (31 May 2019):
 You met on a dating site, where people go looking for dates, not good friends.
As for you giving her your opinion on her rushing into relationships and sleeping with men too fast …. eh, she probably agreed with you to shut you up. She wants you to leave her be and you have been blocked. You ask what to do if she contacts you in the future, you block her right back, you are not a good match for her or vice versa.
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