A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:Please help.My boyfriend and I have been dating exclusively for 7 months and are talking about building a life together. This morning I found a stash of exes dirty panties in his drawer next to our bed. What should I do? Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (18 September 2011): Okay, maybe this is a totally immature response and not everyone will have this sense of humour, but I would be tempted to return to him the surprise and the confusion and the secrecy by not saying anything at all but instead removing all of the dirty knickers and putting something totally - I mean totally - bizarre in there instead. Like...a cold bowl of porridge or 3 different pictures of Prince William. Honestly, just something so unrelated to anything that he just can't add it up. Just leave something in there to let him find it and wait. Then see how he responds to the surprise of finding something so incongruous in his drawer - will he come clean and ask you about it, because if he does then he will have to ask you if you knew about the panties? And at least you can have a good laugh about it. If not...then at least you know he doesn't look in there very often, if at all. Just give him back the job of figuring it all out.
A
female
reader, AuntyEm  +, writes (18 September 2011):
 Sounds like some sort of fetish that he has and it's not evidence that he is unfaithful...(not unless he's still collecting them)
He's probably going to be embarrassed when you confront him but just be honest and say it.
'I found dirty panties and it makes me feel uncomfortable, can we throw them away?'
He's probably always gonna 'collect' and probably has some of yours too, but he's going to have to find another place to keep them.
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A
female
reader, chickpea2011 +, writes (18 September 2011):
 Hi,
Ugh?... I know some guys have fetish... It's their own preferences, and nobody have the right to judge.
The important thing right now is that he's with you. Of course, this upset you. It would upset anybody... It's only normal, and right to feel this way.
You have to talk to him. Show him the findings, tell him that upset you very much. Tell him that you know he has a past, but that now he's with you. Tell him, to get rid of everything he has that belongs to his ex. Its even hurtful that you have to ask him. He should have done those things long time ago, on his own.
I hope he understands you, and that from now on he doesn't have anymore secrets to hide from you.
Good luck
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A
female
reader, PerhapsNot +, writes (18 September 2011):
 If you're uncomfortable breaching the topic with him, present it first objectively. Tell him that keeping dirty panties so close to your own clothing disgusts you and that you find it unsanitary. Then you can ask him why he would keep it as a souvenir.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (18 September 2011):
 Gross.
Ex's as in singular ex maybe the most recent, or in the plural tense meaning various ex's panties?
Just because there are dirty panties stashed in a drawer doesn't mean he's cheating. It could be women left them as reminders or for him to do whatever with {Gags in mouth}.
I would just ask him why he's keeping around these dirty mementos of his past relationships..then throw them out. I don't even like my own dirty drawers lying around.
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