A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My husband has a co worker at work. I am not saying anything is going on between them it's just curiousity for the moment. I noticed that there are a considerable amount of text to and from her. Even one text was in reference to a job and she was telling him what to do, but at the end she said good luck baby. What does this mean? I have been emailing her and she tells me how he loves me and the kids and I wonder is this some sort of tactic to throw me off?What do anyone think about this? I need to know I am going crazy.
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionEddie,
Thanks for the question. Things at home are good. We have always had a good relationship, but he is 12 years older than I am and sometimes I fear that he is loosing or may loose interest. I don't want to read anything into it and I didn't text her she actually emailed me first and she brought up all this stuff about how my husband loves me and the kids. So I was just wondering that's all, but I am definitely going to have a talk with him.
Thanks you made a lot of sense. It's just that I had issues with him and an old friend that was calling him at 2 in the morning and consistently almost an everyday thing. so of course I wonder. He has also told me he thought I was involved with a friend of mine we were texting each other, but once he told me that I stopped it. I still talk to him every blue moon, but I have toned it down due to the respect of my husband.
Thanks
A
male
reader, eddie  +, writes (13 April 2008):
 I have female friends I'm comfortable joking with that someone could misinterpret if they didn't know me. It also depends on the status of their "acquaintance". Referring to someone as "baby" suggests a very friendly, easy relationship. It could also be crossing the line, depending on the comfort level of the friendship.
By texting this woman, you're giving them the opportunity to cover their tracks if they're up to something. You need to set up boundaries in your relationship because harmless banter between adults can lead to something. The more relaxed they become, the closer they can get. They justify it by reasoning to themselves that they're "just friends". Keep your eyes open but try not to over react. You may be right here but you may also be wrong. How are things at home between you and your man?
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (13 April 2008):
 Curiosity kills the cat.
If you go on like this, you will end up being a paranoid and a wreck and will need psychiatric help soon.
You need to trust your husband and gives your worries to Jesus.
Otherwise , there will be no peace in your heart.
Don't let your imaginations run wild.
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A
male
reader, oldbiker  +, writes (13 April 2008):
 Hi,
It's very easy to read 'trouble' into this working relationship, apart from the volume of text, I would assume that there is nothing that you've read that suggests anything unusual is going on. You need to talk to your husband about this, tell him your concerns - calmly. I assume he knows that you've read the messages, otherwise you may get the accusation that you've been spying on him and the retort 'Don't you trust me?' If all concerned are being open (and I don't think that his co-worker is trying to fool you) then I don't think you have anything to worry about. But you have to talk about it with him. It is very probable that he does not realise your fears.
Take care
Oldbiker
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (13 April 2008): Simple, just ask about the text message to your husband. If he is your husband, he cannot get angry for you just being afraid of the status of your relationship. And if he is cheating, well, I don't know.
But odds are, it's just some mistake, misunderstanding, or some inside joke.
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