A
male
age
41-50,
*atinoheat
writes:Ok its been a while since I have posted on here. I had an ex girlfreind who I broke up with. This is because one of her male friends, who I knew and trusted very well. who also happened to be my friend, was getting too close. It bothered me. So I told her. I knew he liked her because he told me a while back that he did before I started dating her. Well problem is they were just too close for my taste. We all worked together and there was no escaping the way they were acting around each other. This is your classic case of a woman playing and lying to two grown men, except I believe the entire time that he was part of it. I will explain later on. She got fired from her job and the reason was because of some inapropriate language. On top of that she was denied finacial aid for the semester and moved back home. Well I had to work with my old friend for a while and he would tell me he moved on and found a new girlfriend. I didnt believe him for one bit. I would ask him to show me a picture of her and he said he didnt have one. I found out recently that the two have been together since I broke up with her and they were trying to keep a secret for some reason. I've known but here lately that's all people at work want to talk to me at work about. I guess maybe that's why I am starting to feel betrayed hurt and angry all over again. I dont like feeling this way. They both lied to me, he said he was over her and wanted nothing to do with her, she said she wanted me back. Well here is where I dont understand why. Lately she's all i've been thinking about. A buddy of mine texted me and asked last night if I had spoken to them lately? I havent spoken to my old friend now for 4 months because he transfered out and I havent spoken to her since we broke up. The guy who texted me was pissed for me because not only did the guy my ex is with lie to me he lied to him too and they were best friends. He got pissed texted him in anger told him I knew that my ex and him were dating. I should of known not to tell him, but he was mad just like a lot of people that work with me and know about the whole situation. He lied to all of us. Here I am thinking i'm over my ex but seeing their kissing pictures on facebook made me furious. I dont understand why. What should I do? I deleted his and her number off my phone and facebook so I wouldnt text either one of them in anger. I'm serriously done with both of them. But it's the fact they lied is what has me feeling this way. Even me deleting them from face book and my phone still doesnt seem enough. How do I get over this anger and rage I have inside of me?
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female
reader, xTheAlmightyDuckx  +, writes (1 December 2011):
 When someone has lied to you i find that behind all the anger and rage there is normanally humilation.
You say you are over them, and by what you have written i beleive that, however you ovbiously feel betrayed and humilated because they lied to you and even though maybe deep down you knew or had a feeling something right wasn't going on, in some respects you probably feel like they got away with it.
Do you maybe sometimes feel how do i say.. regretful? or even guilty and maybe you don't know why?
If so it could be because you didn't say anything, and it is now playing on your mind. Its kind of like when a detective doesn't find out the truth behind the murder and it can make them feel ashamed or unhappy.
I can say that in time the rage and agression will go away, and to speed up that process you need to kind of eliminate them from your thoughts and anything else.
First thing is facebook, that thing is addictive as hell, and even thought you have deleted them there always that temptation to just search them up and have a quick nose into there lifes (as that is kind of what facebook is designed to do).
So maybe you could disable facebook for a while.
Secondly tell your co-workers that whats done is done and you don't want to hear anymore about them. I am sure they will understand.
And lastly, maybe you could pre-occupie your self? Any hobbies or things you enjoy? Or if you are feeling confident maybe get back on the dating scene, meeting knew people will definitly take your mind off the anger you have for them.
I wish good luck to you, and just remember your always better than both of them, and when you feel anger rising up again just think "there both liars, so they must be made for eachother good luck to them!" and don't waste another thought on the matter.
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