A
female
age
30-35,
*nataliebeebaybee1
writes:I currently want to split up with my boyfriend , but its becoming harder and harder each day, he keeps sayin i refuse to accept it. The other day we had a massive arguement because his mam had found out that he takes drugs. She asked me, and i told her that he sniffs coke. I ended up getting the blame and she chucked me out of the house.Theres also other reasons why i want to split up and thats because he never shows me much affection , sexual attention and the sex is basically going down hill its terrible. He either says hes too tired or not in the mood and you can imagine how that feels. I basically couldnt step foot in his house ever again after the arguement and the embaressment i had to go through.There was a girl called cassie that had said adam kissed her on the neck. she thought it was my boyfriend talking to her because id pretended to be him on facebook chat drunk, asking what had happened that night i got the truth ! But after explaining that it was me she said oh i thought it was you. So she might of been trying to wind me up.There was also another time in which me and my boyfriend had invited another couple round we all got really drunk and then a foursome came into the subject i never said no at the time , but the next thing i knew we were all naked. I then said lets kiss and see how that feels and if it feels right we'll go further i looked round to see my boyfriend inside the girl i started to cry and her partner hugged me until i stopped crying. I was discusted how could he do this, it didnt feel right for me.Weve been together for 1 year and theres many things that have happened that i really dislike. I now think its time to move on because theres too much water under the bridge. The thing is he'd said that when i was kissing the boy in the the foursome he thought we were doing something but i highly doubt that as i couldnt of had with the position me and him were sitting in.I really do love my boyfriend but it just doesnt feel right anymore we hardly have sex because of him and im getting alot less attention than i want. what are your views ?
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female
reader, MaryB  +, writes (24 January 2011):
I'm truely sorry that you are going through all of this but, what I have to say is probably not what you want to hear. You have basically answered your own question. Things do not feel right to you & from the sounds of it they aren't. This man is a drug user to say the least & nothing good will ever come from that. Although, you are an adult now & can make up your own mind he has persuaded you to do things against your better judgement for the sake of loving him. On top of all that he has pretty much cheated on you even if it was just a kiss that you know of. It also, sounds like you took the fall for his drug usage- he used you as a scapegoat to his parents.
Trust me, this is not love this guy is showing you. You have to know you deserve better. You are way too young to be sucked into all this drama & all you have gotten in return is total humiliation. Go with your gut & be done with this relationship. There are plenty of guys out there who will treat you with love & the respect you deserve. This guy is not that guy! Have respect for yourself & get over him before something worse happens to you. Thus far is a good indication of the disasters that await you down the road. Deep down I know you already believe what I am telling you so stop hesitating because you think there is a chance that things will change with him- I can pretty much guarantee they will not. Take care.
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