A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I feel like the more I get older and the more successful I become then the more I lose my female friends. Please someone explain how or why? I'm 35 years old and it hurtful and confusing. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, MsSadie  +, writes (11 August 2013):
 Maybe they're jealous. Maybe you don't have as much time for them. Maybe you all weren't compatible in the first place. Maybe they weren't the kind of friends that are meant to stick around forever (have you ever heard that thing about the three kinds of friends: the ones who exist for a reason, for a season, or the ones who last for a lifetime?)
Don't think that just because this is happening to you that it can be chalked up to a common behavior among women. I fell on hard times a year and a half ago, and have pulled myself up, am working hard, and am finding success, and my old friends are all very supportive and proud of me.
I don't talk to them nearly as much as I used to because I moved to another city and am rather involved in my schoolwork, but the love and support are still there.
A
female
reader, TasteofIndia +, writes (11 August 2013):
 It could be that your friends are jealous of your success, and seeing you climb the ladder makes them feel worse about their own positions in life. They feel like they work just as hard, and it's hard to watch you be so fortunate.
It could also be that you are changing with your success. Maybe you are talking more about your good fortune, or buying more nice things, or wanting to go to more expensive places? Even if it's subtle, you could be changing and turning off your friends. You also note that you're losing your female friends - are you looking good? Are you friendly? Could it be that they are starting to feel uneasy having you around their significant others?
Or, perhaps they're a bit intimidated by you. Maybe they don't feel good enough for you, now that you're successful and they're still on lower rungs. Maybe they feel like they have more in common with each other than with you.
I'm sorry, and it really sucks that your friends are leaving. I'm not sure why they're vanishing, but there are some theories! Good luck figuring it out! :)
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 August 2013): Sorry to hear, women are nasty at times, and unfortunately women can be very jealous, and nasty, even friends, especially if you are successful, they dont have it and they want what you have, and they cant be happy for you without envy or even dislike. Some women cant help it and it can get nasty or mean. Remember you're real, good friends wont do this to you! those that are jealous and dont contact you are not your real friends. It's hard but dont worry about them and dont "kiss butt" to them, or contact them if they make no effort with you, it can look desperate. Your real friends will be there for you, and will be happy,focus on them, and.. if thats only a few people, thats OK, they are true friends. Fake people arent friends.Please remember too though not to be conceited or arrogant, always be humble, im not saying you are conceited! but.. some people cant help it and can get like this with success, being conceited wont help.all the best
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A
female
reader, janniepeg  +, writes (11 August 2013):
 You might have thought that being successful mean your friends would congratulate you and feel happy for you. Your friends are probably jealous because they probably work just as hard and can't understand what you have that they don't.
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