A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:omg please will someone help me, i really need some advise, so please please please ! read this for me, thank you.ok so ive been going out with this guy for nearly two years (he is 21, i'm 19) and although we had a rough start in the relationship, things seemed to improve and we really fell for each other. Im on a gap year this year before uni and we chose to travel around the world for 6 months, i mean i really had always thought about doing this but never thought i would, so we booked the flights, and were already having petty arguments. nevertheless we carried on and i thought things were going well but now i think i was just making do for the sake of the trip, so off we went and it was.. pleasant, yeah i no, there was nothing really wrong with it, its just we never went out on a night and he just didnt want to, i dont think he trusted me with other guys around, in 6! months we didn't go out to get drunk and party. this guy is really nice and the type you could see yourself happy with at old age, he's not the type of guy to cheat or stray, but now were back things dont seem to be right, well thats just it were not doing anything anymore, and its really boring, so ive been going out and making some new friends, and i feel so alive, last night was the best night i think i've had ever had.one of my friends has a gf (finally) and there really good together well we went to a few bars and then to a place called ramshakle, google it, which i really love, and there i meet one of her friends who is 18 and has a bf who is 17. but omg i cant belive how cute he is and how much more in common we have, we didn't do anything just talked. and i dont think anythings going to go on, but hes so much more my type, really cute, has the most amazing personality and i couldnt sleep all night, he is in my head all the time. i mean it i was in my bed trying to sleep for 8 hours and nothing just him.i really love my bf or at least i did, but i dont no if the magics gone, i feel safe with him, and i want more, but i dont no how i would end it or weather i should stick it out. this guy is really nice like i said and has a bf but i think i really want to just explore myself more. and meet more people like him.you see i was bullyed at school, quite, found it hard to make friends, and i'm 19! and only now i've started. god i hope this makes sence but what do i do,? do i just make do and not see these people of so i don't think about them or leave him, its been so long and im really close to his family, help, please someone, leave a comment even if you don't understand and ill try some more. thank you so much guys x
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reader, anonymous, writes (30 May 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you everyone!! you have really helped us though this, where back together :)i think the main thing was i just feeling so emo and so forgot everything we had done, all the good times, all the love, this other guy was just messing with my head, and i really should have just opened my eyes. when you feel low, just dont listen to songs about brake ups and sadness.again thank you so much.joe x
A
male
reader, Merisier  +, writes (30 May 2008):
You don't want t leave your boyfriend just because a stranger that have a lot in comment with you. Plus he has a boyfriend, what you planning on doing, you gona ask him 2 break up 2 his bf ? List man the best thing to is to talk to your boyfriend and try 2 work things out.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (28 May 2008): dear lboy, please read the very first answer to his question, it is by the original poster of the question, saying that he HAD finished with his bf, that it was a messy ending, and that he now had nothing. this was why people gave answers based on the assumption that he had already dumped his bf. because indeed he had.
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male
reader, lboy +, writes (28 May 2008):
 dear reader,
don't listen to most of the replies you have recieved so far they don't seem to realize that you are saying you don't know what to do, they seem to see this as you've already finished him, they think your saying the sex has stopped when your not, i know what your talking about you want a relationship that even afetr many years still has that spark, looking at him still makes your heart race, being with him always seem exciting, your saying thats gone that it feels dull that you don't go out anymore but hun u dont have to go out to have a good time, some of the greatest times me and my bf have had have been curled up in bed watching a good film yeh it aint exciting but you feel loved, if u need the excitement then talk to him try get things back to the way they used to be, your not thinking with your penis or your head you just feeling, a feeling you've gotten used to has changed which is scary but dont let it faze you stick to him and keep him, he sounds like a great catch and you'd be a fool to let him go for some younger guy that already has someone, trust me if u talk to him and get your feelings out there it should all go fine, and if BOTH of you decide to break it off then at least you can stay in touch trust me it took a whole year after me and my bf broke up for the first time for me to relize that i should have spoken to him and made more of an effort, i missed him and trust me you'll feel the same, you'll miss the feel of his arms around you at night. just talk to him, work it out and let me know how it goes ok, thats all i can say.
good luck
lboy
xxx
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2008): yeh, let us know how this goes :)
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2008): p.s, keep us informed
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2008): call him before its too late honey !
i had the same problem with my boyfriend, i felt that he didn't make the effort anymore, but i realised that it was a joint thing, i didn't tell him that i felt like that, and how was he to know ? cos i pretended everything was allright.
i didn't call him aftrewards, but still thought about him a lot. then i saw him with a new girlfriend and it really hurt me, and i remembered all the good times i had, and i will regret it for the rest of my life probably, cos it could have been fixed. maybe your boyfriend was getting bored too !
you never know ? thats why its important to talk to each other, when your in a relationship.
good luck in whatever you decide to do xxx
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2008): what a typical stereotype gay guy you are. thinking with whats in your pants, rather than whats on your shoulders.
its your loss mate
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2008): you seem to blame just him for the magic going out of your relationship, but it was probably you too. can you really say you tried 100% for the whole relationship ?it takes two to tango.
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2008): whats done is done, you've messed it up, he won't forgive you, move on !
its that simple, next time think about something other than your penis !
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2008): omg, fix it you fool, the longer you leave it the harder it will be, and the more he will thing you have been seeing other people !
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male
reader, frogslegs  +, writes (27 May 2008):
whats the point in this question ?
sounds like you've messed this one up already.
it would take a pretty amazing guy to forgive you for this.
sorry but i think you could have screwed this one up !
good luck
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male
reader, carrotsandfigs +, writes (27 May 2008):
i think the other responses sum it up well enough
your an idiot, and he's probably better of without you
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male
reader, mebeglad +, writes (27 May 2008):
you say in your little repost that you added "i have nothing... bye..."
i think you realise you've done the wrong thing cos you say you have nothing ! obviously this guy meant more than you realised.
in what way was it a messy ending ?
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female
reader, maybeormaybenot +, writes (27 May 2008):
my god ! this one is so simple.
you had a guy who sounds like what we are all after, and you chucked him ? you are crazy !
if i was you, and if he'll still talk to you, i would do anything to get him back.
cos now he knows he needs to do more to keep you entertained, seems like the perfect package.
and who says that you can't explore YOURSELF'S more, TOGETHER.
thats a great part of being in a relationship,especially at your age, learning what you like and dislike together.
good luck, hope you work this one out.
and remember, there is more to life than getting drunk and partying, although it is fun.
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male
reader, youwillhateme +, writes (27 May 2008):
yeh, i think u shud of told him thats how u felt. after 2 yrs i think u owed it to him,
"this guy is really nice and the type you could see yourself happy with at old age, he's not the type of guy to cheat or stray"
do u realise that this is what most people r after ?
have you suggested going out ? it sounds like he doesn't stop YOU going out, does he know ur friends ? maybe he just feels a little uncomfortable round them cos their a bit younger ?
are your friends gay ? maybe he's insecure ?
he sounds like a great guy, and if you don't want him, can i have his number ? :) lol
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reader, anonymous, writes (27 May 2008): i agree with the other response, it seems simple, you should have told him, and given him a chance to put things right. you say you met this other person, and you really liked him. its natural for you to still find other people attractive, even when your in a relationship. but thats as far as it goes, an attraction. and if your feeling down about your relationship anyway, maybe you read more into it than there was ?
it seems you had something that is very rare to find, someone who really loves you, and someone who, had you given them the chance, maybe could have shown you a new side to their personality.
more the fool you, for not giving him the chance.
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reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionplease can i have some more replys, that one has really helped, and i thank you a lot for it
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 May 2008): maybe you should have told him how you felt, and given him a chance to explain, and maybe put things right. if he didn't know that you wanted to go out more, and that you thought the magic had gone, how was he meant to do anything about it ?
and if he was as nice as you say he was, maybe he was worth the chance ? what would you have lost by talking to him about it ? it seems like a small thing was missing, just nights out, if he was nice in every other way, why not give him a chance to take you out and "wow" you again ?
you never know, maybe he felt the same ?
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 May 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionwell thanks guys, i ended up with a messy ending after 18, or i needed was some advice, i have nothing... bye...
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