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The girl I have been chasing doesn't have interest in me!

Tagged as: Forbidden love<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (16 January 2011) 3 Answers - (Newest, 17 January 2011)
A male Singapore age 30-35, anonymous writes:

Recently, the girl I have been chasing doesn't seems to have interest with me (based on what we have been talking during a long conversation, and ONLY IF it is honest reply which I hope...) It has been clear that this girl have low esteem, she always have the feeling that she does not worth it for me, she doesn't even know her own strength... and what she has been feeling is that our differences in communication can lead to many problems. However, I think it in a different way, communication and thinking can be understand, just tat it take times and effort. So it is like a pessimistic girl and optimistic guy..

But I have been wondering, why does she suddenly talks to me, concern about me often (to the point of taking NOTE on how late I often stay online in msn, or what I post on facebook), and so on? And whenever I post something on facebook that is related about moving on, she suddenly talks to me and even post video/quotes about love? And she have been asking me whether I still like her for several times. I asked her "why suddenly ask me this qns?" She replied it that it is just curosity. Even in the past, she tries to make time with me and we usually go off together.

There was once she said she do not want to be shy girl anymore in fb. Then all of a sudden, she talks to me, and even ask me why I do not have initiuative. (The reason i do not initiate is coz i'm bad in people situation in the past, and also she don't make an effort, and i fear that i disturb her since she is busy often).

Just that she doesn't try to meet up anymore since she is VERY busy nowadays, even to the point she having difficulty meeting up with some of her friends and even stress about her time management. By the way, she tends to feel guilty whenever I try make lot of effort to meet her up to go home together or help her something.She also feels that there is no more topic for us to talk about even thought I still can find topic to talk to. But there are several times where she suddenly start the conversation randomly. And i ask her why, she said: "dunno? feels like talking to you", I know she got other best friends to talk to or even conversation in fb, so why me?

And NOW the problematic issues is that I told her I have finally move on since we were talking about each other feelings which I mentioned just now, and so, the conversation ended coz she want to go to sleep, THEN after few mins later, she suddenly post on her fb wall, I'm not sure is it something about regretting action or anger..

So anyway, I have been wondering, is it because she does not exactly know how she feels about me, and how will the relationship last if we were to went into one? And is it also because she does not know what she want at all? Is it because of me? For not giving her the confidence and security that our relationship can last if we got into one? What should I do now?

p.s. She is having little sleeping hrs often, and so she seems to have signs of stress up, depress, confuse, etc easily...

View related questions: best friend, confidence, facebook, move on, msn, shy

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A female reader, NinjaGirl09 United States +, writes (17 January 2011):

why dont you just let her know how u feel about her? or get one of her friends to see if she feels what u feel for her. or one day send her flowers with a card on it explaining everything.

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A reader, anonymous, writes (17 January 2011):

what u need to do is pull her aside and talk to her about what she likes its not all about the beauty its all about what is in side

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A female reader, Denissia Trinidad and Tobago +, writes (17 January 2011):

Denissia agony auntMy friend,a guy,has been chasing me and i wasnt taking him on either. What frm wat u said,i realize she is childish,selfish and jealous. Come on you deserve better,move on,she wants the attention,but wen u move on,she'll miss it,its simple,she is confused,depressed,u do not need her in ur life,it seems unbalanced an u sound sentimental an optimistic. Go for better,hey im single an im optimistic. The guy who has been chasing me for three years even tho i was critically damaged never gave up on me,but i never took him on,i got involved with sum1 else,was planning to get married,but i realized i loved the guy who was chasing me afta all,all because he became a part of me,he wud call even wen i told him i was wit my bf,an our friendship grew,he was there wen i needed him. Im in love with him now,i told him an he seems to be backing away. He proclaims he still likes me,but i feel he heard wat he wanted to hear an he lost interest,love is a funny thing,who knows,i have faith he might surprise me...cuz i surprised him...Has she actually mentioned its torture that u liked her and she now loves you because u liked her for soo long an it hurts that she hurt u? Look at the bigger picture. I hope this helped sum1,but i think u will hang on to her every word,so wen ur heart is involved,if she seems immature,be wary,u'll be happier without her okay...

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