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Teenage Relationships: Girls

Tagged as: Pregnancy, Sex, Teenage<< Previous question   Next question >>
Article - (1 December 2010) 5 Comments - (Newest, 30 December 2010)
A female United Kingdom age 26-29, soldier16 writes:

THIS INFORMATION IS FOR GIRLS!!!!!(and boys if you really want to).

Girls if you are in a relationship you might want to read this.

When in a teenager relationship girls tend to be pressured to do what they don't wish to do i.e sex. if you have a boyfriend and he's pressuring you to have sex and you don't feel the need or don't want to say NO to him because:

1, at the end of the day when you become pregnant you are the one that's going to be kicked out of school not him.

2, if you're not lucky, your parents are going to disown you.

3. Nobody is going to want you to work for them if you have not got any GCSEs. they are going think you are dumb.

4, your boyfriend is going dump you but if you are extremely lucky, he might stay by your side.

5, people are not going to give you respect; they will look at you like you are s**t.

So next time your boyfriend pressures you have sex, say NO. if he persists make him swear that if you becomes pregnant, he will stay by your side no matter what(make him write a statement with a signiture and trust me it works).

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A female reader, babygirl14 United States +, writes (30 December 2010):

babygirl14 agony auntomg i am 14 bout to be 15 my boyfriend is16 and we had sex once and the condom broke:( and i might be pregnant i toldmy mother she doesnt believe me i dont know what to do i dont wanna get kicked out or dissowned and have no where to go and no where to work my boyfriend says he will be there for us bc he works to......i dont know what to do since i just got done reading this :(

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A female reader, Anna.mika India +, writes (20 December 2010):

i total agree with you guys. seriously, you do not want to be pressurised into having sex, just remember this is not something thats important just for him but also for you, especially if its your first time. also if he really loves you he'll wait till you're comfortable with it rather than asking for it like a favor, sex is just too intimate to be done like that

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A female reader, TheHuggleBear United Kingdom +, writes (4 December 2010):

TheHuggleBear agony auntOk, I think you may be being a touch dramatic abut some of that =P most schools wont automatically throw you out of school; most of them are very supportive of young girls that get pregnant. Also, if you are under the age of 16; the father can be arrested for rape -- thats pretty serious.

MOST parents (generalisation) are also quite supportive; remember that they raised you and they love you.

The GCSE is pretty true though; no way to sugar coat that.

Don't automatically assume the father will dump you! (Although, your boyfriend might, if he's not the father =P) I mean, it might take him a while to get used to the idea; but you need to discuss with him what you're going to do. There may be a select few that will dump you; but for the most part they can be pretty good about it.

People won't look at you like you're shit for having sex. When you're having sex on a regular basis with a different man everytime THATS when people will disrespect you.

And you must always remember that there is ALWAYS a risk of pregnancy -- even with a condom, so don't assume that using one makes you invincible. Using condoms and being on the pill tends to be the safest sex. Remember also that condoms are the only form of mainstream contrception that protect both of you from STI's and HIV.

Lastly; it's up to YOU whether you want to have sex -- don't feel pressured into saying yes, but don't feel pressured into saying no either. If you feel it's right, and it's what you want then that's your decision; don't let anyone tell you what you should or shouldn't do when it domes to losing your virginity (apart from advice about protection!); I lost mine at quite a young age and I have never once regretted it!

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A male reader, SHOcker23turbo United States +, writes (4 December 2010):

i agree that if a boyfriend pressures you into sex, then tries to make you feel bad or something for not putting out, chances are he just wants sex. or thats the only thing he cares about. girls. be smart, if a guy is pressuring you into things. re-think your relationship.

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A female reader, Dorothy Dix Australia +, writes (1 December 2010):

Hi there. Having sex does not always result in an automatic pregnancy, although it's certainly possible.

If you don't want to or are not ready to be having sex in your life, yes, I agree - definitely say no.

In any case, no-one should ever start having sex until they are absolutely emotionally ready. It's a big step in anybody's life.

What you say about wanting a guy to sign a written agreement that he will stay with you if you do fall pregnant - sounds good, but it's not legally binding. No matter what happened, it probably wouldn't work out. There'd be no end of problems. Lack of commitment for a start.

At the young age you are (13-15), you would not be wanting a permanent relationship at this stage of life, should a pregnancy ever occur now. It would be the last thing you or a guy would ever want. There is so much more you would want for yourself, before becoming a mother and a wife.

In years to come, and after you have finished your education, you might well want to travel, work overseas - lots of things.

When it does come to the place in your life where you do want to have sex, just be sure you like the guy enough to do this in the first place. Then if you are absolutely sure, and you are ready to start having sex, then make sure he uses a condom. Then there's no risk of pregnancy.

Good luck and best wishes.

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