A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Please help me, I feel so lost and helpless.Been with my beautiful lady for three years now, discussed wedding and living together etc. Happiest I have ever been in my life.Recently she tells me she cant love me properly, says we should cool things. No-one else is involved, she says I never did anything wrong its just that she nees help to learn how to love me the right way.What does she mean and what can I do? I fee so low and lonely, its like my life has just come to stop when everything was so good just a few months ago.
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male
reader, yussuf  +, writes (29 November 2009):
 My friend you are not alone on this. i had to go through the same thing. From my understanding, if she wants to slow things down then you have to ease of her a little bit. Be sure to ask her about why she has suddenly came to decide for a slow down and re-assure that you her there for her and that she should feel free to tell you whatever she's going through. I think it's way more deeper than she claims, i mean why all of a sudden she wants to slow it down after so long? it might be that there's someone in the picture that you don't know about or she's going through some other problems, but whatever the case might be you have to find out now and do not act needy of clingy when you do. i hope this helps. goodluck!
A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (28 November 2009):
 She is afraid of commitment, feeling a bit depressed, or interested in someone else. There is an indication that she has done something that she is ashamed of.
What can you do?
One, focus on her happiness. You will not be happy until she is.
Two be forgiving and accepting. Let her know that you love her even if she made a mistake. Make sure you complement her, without drowning her in complements.
And last, if she has found someone else and leaves, let her go gracefully.
FA
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A
female
reader, DiamondGirlx +, writes (28 November 2009):
 OKAY heres what to do, reassure her that she doesnt need to change anything about her you love her for who she is, sit her down hold her hand and talk to her gently telling her you can't live without her and you can help her through this question of hers.
seek relationship councilling, it may help when ur both discussing ur problems with someone.
If you dont know what she means ask her!
i hope it all works out for you :) D.Gx
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