A
female
age
36-40,
*oma78
writes:I met this guy about 3 years ago and we dated for a long time, i found out he was cheating on me with his cousin 4 months into the relationship. I was furious and broke it off. I got back with him, but in between i met this wonderful man. Hes older than me and treated me right. I left my ex for him and my ex was furious, becuase he knew i wanted to leave becuase of him. I spent about a year dating him, and now i went back to my ex who promised me that he would stop talking to his couisn, becuase when we broke up he went back to her. I just hate incest i feel i am traumatized, and i am happy but it is very hard, and i think i miss this other guy, but i already am engaged feel content but yet i always think of my fiance talking to his cousin and i get scared even though he tells me he loves me and only me.
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female
reader, easternkygirl  +, writes (24 October 2008):
if i were in your shoes, i would break off the engagement right away. i know that is easier said than done, but you will never be able to fully trust him after what he has done to you. and without trust in a relationship, there really is no relationship, and you will not have a happy relationship that's fulfilling to you. the first red flag should have been when he cheated on you WITH HIS COUSIN!! the fact that he would sleep with his own cousin would be enough to end it immediately, FOR GOOD! but i understand that you love him and gave him another chance, because it's hard to just turn your feelings off or on like a water faucet. but you must face the reality, because he went back to her when you met the older man, he obviously wanted to be with her, and i would almost bet you that if you and him have problems again for whatever reason, there's no doubt in my mind, he will go back with her again. it's not worth the pain and suffering to put yourself through that again. you need to think about your own happiness and just sit down and tell him how you feel. think about it, can you really stand to go through all this again? he will tell you he loves you and that your the only one, but he's already proved to you thats not true. if the older man is still single and wants to be with you, i would be gone LIKE YESTERDAY! if not, i would rather be without than to be with a guy who dates his own cousin. i hope everything works out for the best and hope that you will make the right decision for you :-) good luck to you.
A
male
reader, Bryanz +, writes (24 October 2008):
In my opinion. You shouldn't go back with your ex, if he cheated on you. But said he wouldn't again, chances are he will do it again. If you are engaged and you acully love him with your heart. Be with him, not the other person. Remember, marrage is perm, you can't just hop around from guy to guy or girl to girl. And divorces costs a lot of money and both of you're signatures. Goodluck, and if you're not ready for marrage I suggest you pospone the marrage.
Best of luck. =3
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