A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:I am in my early 20s, and I am a working professional. I went from one of the most social situations (college) to one of the least social ones. When I go out, I see interesting guys that I want to meet but I don't know how to make the icebreaker. I don't know how to interrupt what they're doing. I'm afraid I would come off as weird, just going up to them and introducing myself.Any suggestions or ideas? I've been in long term relationships before and I've been single and working on myself and hanging out with friends for a while and I'm ready to go out there...but I need a little bit of a lift-off. Reply to this Question
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male
reader, bournedout +, writes (8 May 2010):
When you say you see guys when you are out, do you mean at a bar or something? That's not the best place to really get to meet people anyway, let alone if you are a little shy. There are better places.
Anyway, if you must go out, then why not bring along a wing...uh..girl (men have "wingmen" -- I don't know the best term for a woman)? Preferably one who is more at ease with strange guys. It is far less intimidating. You guys can just casually sidle over to him and his friend. (If his friend is not very attractive, the your girlfriend may have to "take one for the team" -- talk to his friend just to avoid being awkward. Guys often support each other like that)
As far as what to say -- just say "Hi! Are you guys from ___? Did I see you at ___? You look like you're having fun." Actually, you can say almost anything. It really does not matter. If he is open to getting to know you, he will respond. Also keep in mind that guys (and girls for that matter) *love* to talk about themselves. So you can almost never go wrong asking him questions. Well, you may get really bored after a while, but then you just move on.
If he snubs you, well you just turn back to your girlfriend. Maybe casually move away.
Good luck!
A
female
reader, laetitia  +, writes (8 May 2010):
 Try going out with your girlfriends to social events. You don't want to look desperate, but as if you are having fun, which is what you should be doing anyway!
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