A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: Please help. I broke up with my very long distance, long term boyfriend about 2 months ago. We parted on good terms, as in we still loved each other but realised it was never going to be possible to be together. It was the hardest thing I've ever had to do and I still cry for him. But six weeks after we split I went away on holiday with a friend and ended up having a holiday fling with a local but this guy was a lot like my boyfriend. He was really keen so I'm taking another holiday to the same location. I know, bad idea, I don't want to end up in the same situation but this guy does take my mind off my ex so I just want to go have fun and forget. Fair enough right? I'm going away in 2 days and today I get an email from my ex. I just dont know what to think... he refers to me as a 'friend' yet mentions very intimate moments between us. He says he's happy to hear from me (I wrote 2 months ago) but he tells me he's in financial trouble. I just don't know what to make of this or what to do? Should I e-mail? If so saying what? I still love him, dispite going to see another guy. And then there's this 'rebound' guy. I mean I know there's not much chance of it but what if he falls for me? I'm so confused right now and I've got myself into a pickle. I'm not exactly seeking advice just need some support.... I just dunno what else to do or say.
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broke up, long distance, my ex, on holiday Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (3 September 2007): hey girlie i m in situation
A
female
reader, agonyauntlisaxxxx +, writes (27 August 2007):
Rebounds do work. I was half over my ex when I got with my recent bloke. You need to ask urself inside What's better for you. I've been with my fella for 6 month now and couldn't be happier. Leave ur ex in the past, stay with this new bloke, Work out ur feelings on you're own at the same time, Work on you have time for you. xxx
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A
male
reader, DJ8433 +, writes (23 August 2007):
Been there. The only way to move on is to move on. Chalk it up to hurt and pain of being a beautiful and loving human. Get ready for the next pain too, but love the love when you're with them. There's no feeling like it.
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A
female
reader, Reina +, writes (23 August 2007):
Your situation sounds a lot like the one i was in two years ago. At first, my boy friend and I lived in the same neighborhood, but then he ended up moving 2000 miles away. Anyway, we did the long distance relationship thing for 2 years--with short visits in between--and then we ended it because it just wasn't working. We still loved each other dearly, but we stopped talking. Shortly after the break, I met a guy who ended up being a "rebound." we started dating, but it ended horribly. I began to feel as though i was using him to get over my ex and then i realized i just really didn't like him as much as i thought. It's almost like I was trying to fill a void in my life or something. Anyway, I still had deep feelings for my ex. I didn't allow myself to fully become emotionaly unattached to my ex before moving on. So two months later my ex contacted me and told me that he still loved me and that he was confused about things. Since the rebound didn't cure my strong feelings for my ex--it really only made me feel worse after time--i decided to get back with my ex. Unfortunately it was a bad idea. We're not together anymore. I just wish that I had let myself get over my ex so I could really move forward. I know where you're coming from though so just be careful.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (23 August 2007): No, make a clean break. You are obviously trying to move on, don't let this slight obstacle keep you from meeting other more accessible companionships. good luck!
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