A
female
age
51-59,
*indy036
writes:Hi, I am a mother of 5, my oldest daughter is graduating this year...Then I have a 16 year old daughter and a 14 year old son, a 11 and 10 year old daughters. Well, when I was 20 I was ran over by a drunk driver, I had a spinal cord injury, I never cried, never really thought about myself just got on with life. My right leg is paralyzed and I have 12 inch rods in my back. Before that I was homeless most of my childhood till I turned 12, living in the back seat of a car. Sleeping behind Casinos in Henderson, NV and behind truck stops, Rest areas, I've slept on the floor in them when I was 10 or so. My dad and mom both alcoholics, verbally and physically abusive. My brother and I had to fend for ourselves. My brother learned to steal and now he is in prison for the rest of his life cause of it. I feel like I could stare out the window all day and let life pass me by. Yet, I want some happiness. My husband of 11 years, fights with my kids all the time and they all rise to the occasion. Leaving me in the middle, cause I will not allow anyone to hit my children. I have worked for the last 15 years with my disability, but now I just got approved for SSD. I was hoping for more cause I can't work due to Arthritis, my leg, plus I had a 36inch DVT in my left leg and now have constant pain in it. I want my own life but I can't afford it. $612 a month. I could get foodstamps but still. When all of my kids are gone I wont have anything. I just don't know. I am already on Lexapro for depression. I have bursitis in both hips cant walk much, I feel like I have nothing but my kids to live for, not myself. I do lots of things for them even if it causes me pain and they don't seem to appreciate it. I make beautiful cakes and parties for B-Days, I make Prom dresses and give money I don't have to them and it never seems to be enough. I don't want my husband to touch me, I haven't had sex with him for months and I don't want to. I want to move on but I am so afraid I wont make it...I don't know what to do. Please help...There is so much more to this story too. My husband has done so many things hitting my daughter 10 minutes after I left the house and I had to rush home. I couldn't even work, he was calling me at work all the time, my kids calling them all fighting. Sometimes I wish I could roll up into a ball and disappear, I would if I knew my kids were safe and okay. I don't know please help me...
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 April 2010): I wish I knew what to tell you...I hope someone here will be able to give you great advice and a direction to start in. However, I think you need more than just an idea of what to do, but somewhere to go for resources to get what you need to do!I suggest talking to a councilor for help. Not only for therapeutic reasons, but for advice and programs you can reach out to, resources you can tap into that will give you all the benefits you need.It bothers me when so many people play the system and that don't need these benefits. Yet, here you are, struggling in life with medical determents amongst them!I don't know of any in particular, but I do know there are programs funded by the government that will pay your rent, furnish your home, even supply christmas present on the holidays. They usually go accoridng to your income, but you could apply for disability. Then again, it varies by state...Just talk to someone. Councilor or government official. Do some research, whatever. Do something- help yourself help you children and get out of this mess. =)
A
female
reader, clairabella  +, writes (15 April 2010):
 God you've been through hell and back your poor thing! I'm so sorry you had to go through all that, but i agree you really need to think of your kids, have you thought about talking to your gp about this? anti depressants can help, and councelling will help you build up the strength to get you out of this situation. You've been through too much to give up now. Your kids need you more than anything, and standing up against the people who hurt them and you is one of the most difficult things you could do, but it needs to be done x
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A
male
reader, IHateWomanBeaters +, writes (15 April 2010):
 The most important thing is not you, but your daughters and sons.You are leaving them with an abusive man. The fact of the matter is their happiness is the key to your happiness.The key to their happiness is divorcing your husband.You can work, but not when he is hitting your daughters. You have to do the right thing, get a divorce, and get your children out of an abusive situation before they grow up to be troubled adults.You have to make the right decision now, not later. Are you a weak woman? Or are you a good mother? If you stay, you are a weak woman. If you leave, you are a good mother.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (15 April 2010):
 My sympathies for your misfortunes. You are going through a very difficult time in your life.
I pray for your well being and to God to give you the strength to face your daily routine . May God's grace and healing powers be upon you .
Please seek Him and allow Him to work on your life.
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A
female
reader, terrifenby +, writes (15 April 2010):
 The very first thing you need to do hunni is leave that man, no body is more important than your kids you know that from the way you were raised. Take a look at your family your children... have you done a good job in raising them. Id say so seen as your eldest is graduating soon! Get rid of the bloke and focus on your life. Focus on your kids! You will make it, you just need a little faith in yourself and a few less people making your life harder than what it already is. I respect you alot of people would have giving up years ago. You havent so dont give up now! Chin up and keep smiling! And as for your husband....you cant teach a dog new tricks but you can certainly teach them not to mess with your family!
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