A
female
age
26-29,
*TheAlmightyDuckx
writes:Hey, yep its me again so thanks for taking the time to read my question.I haven't been at school for about a year now and now and my family and I are making the necessary changes for me to go back to school. Only problem is many schools round my area and out of my area do not have any places so it could take a long time to find one. But i have been thinking (and i mean reallllly thinking) and now i think i have a solution even though to some people it might sound crazy. I left my previous school because i had a mental breakdown which resulted in giving me severe anxcity and panic attacks. I was bullied at my old school and previous friends did contribute quite a bit to my break down. I still see some of them now and there just as nasty as they used to be. Because of the bullying and the changes almost everynight i have dreams about my old friends, i normally have panic attacks when i see some of them and it is just insane. But i want to be brave i want an education and i want to get rid of this anxcity, so i think maybe going back to where it all started might just cure it and make it go away. (i know it sounds crazy) But i have strong feelings it will, i know i think everyone there hates me but i know that isn't the case (even though i large majority does) and maybe once i see it isn't as bad my brain might stop going into panic mode. Anyway what do you think good or bad idea?
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female
reader, Abella  +, writes (16 November 2011):
 and a little PS to the much loved xAlmightyDuck. It may mean little to you, but, as voted by ALL users who chose to rate your answers in DC, XAlmightyDuck is currently in positon number one in the TopAunts/Uncles list. I Just had to say congratulations, to you, for you are clearly much loved by many.
Your sweet kind heart has clearly struck a chord with many. You have insight and wisdom indeed, no doubt developed as a result of all that you have survived. Well done.
A
female
reader, Candid Cally +, writes (31 October 2011):
Have you considered an online school or online/correspondance courses? Is a home-schooling program an option for you?
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (31 October 2011):
If you want to transition into going back to school ask if you can continue your lessons by correspondence for the first three months.
It will take discipline on your part, though you sound responsible enough to handle it.
Do not let these morons get to you. Because they are INADEQUATE for daring to bully you.
By the way this re-victimisation is common when the School ethos of "no bullying" is not properly respected nor adhered to by the teachers and the Principal.
Walk confidently past the Morons. And let Opray Winfreys words ring in your head: "what other people think of you is none of your business. You do not have time to worry about what everyone else is thinking. You need to concentrate on what you think"
Believe in yourself. wear Ear plugs in the corridors if you think it will help.
Best of luck
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A
female
reader, xTheAlmightyDuckx +, writes (31 October 2011):
xTheAlmightyDuckx is verified as being by the original poster of the question Thankyou for your suggestions :) It has really helped, i do think the part time bit is a really good idea and i know that i will have to change my life style quite considerably from what i am doing now. As you said about a new school that is the main problem at the moment, i cannot find any around my area (i live in a very small town) that have places and are willing to let me in. Its quite sad really as with this day and age you think that places would make exceptions, but it seems the only place avalible is back at my old school and i know i shouldn't worry about it but time is running out. Here we stay in school until the age of 16 i am almost 15 and have missed a year out so the pressure is really on. I know that if i go back there things are going to be hard, i know about the certain people who are gonna try and make my life a living hell and now i think i am brave enough to face it. You see i went back there about two months after the break down and it just wasn't good within the first hour i already had people making remarks asking when my crufew to go back to the loony bin was up. I ovbiously couldn't deal it with it and ran away. Ever since then i have been running from my problems thinking if i go here or if i go there then they will all dissapear, but the problem is my way of thinking and the term "you can run but you can't hide" really applies to me. I now want to go back to clear the air with a few people who unfortunely due to my mental health status i just had to drop out of my life. I really see this as facing my fears and trying to make a future for myself and if it involes going through anothe hurricane for a rainbow i will do it. I will apply for a school counsiler but i already know there is a waiting list. atm i don't have a therapist as we are dealing with some legal issues with my last one due to revealing confidental information. I will very soon be getting another asscessment and will be having a psychologist's test as it could be anxiety which isn't self inflicted but just the way my brain has been wired so thankyou and i will keep in mind about everything you have said.
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A
female
reader, xTheAlmightyDuckx +, writes (31 October 2011):
xTheAlmightyDuckx is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThankyou for your suggestions :) It has really helped, i do think the part time bit is a really good idea and i know that i will have to change my life style quite considerably from what i am doing now. As you said about a new school that is the main problem at the moment, i cannot find any around my area (i live in a very small town) that have places and are willing to let me in. Its quite sad really as with this day and age you think that places would make exceptions, but it seems the only place avalible is back at my old school and i know i shouldn't worry about it but time is running out. Here we stay in school until the age of 16 i am almost 15 and have missed a year out so the pressure is really on. I know that if i go back there things are going to be hard, i know about the certain people who are gonna try and make my life a living hell and now i think i am brave enough to face it. You see i went back there about two months after the break down and it just wasn't good within the first hour i already had people making remarks asking when my curfew to go back to the loony bin was up. I ovbiously couldn't deal it with it and ran away. Ever since then i have been running from my problems thinking if i go here or if i go there then they will all dissapear, but the problem is my way of thinking and the term "you can run but you can't hide" really applies to me. I now want to go back to clear the air with a few people who unfortunely due to my mental health status i just had to drop out of my life. I really see this as facing my fears and trying to make a future for myself and if it involes going through another hurricane for a rainbow i will do it. I will apply for a school counsellor but i already know there is a waiting list. atm i don't have a therapist as we are dealing with some legal issues with my last one due to revealing confidental information. I will very soon be getting another asscessment and will be having a psychologist's test as it could be anxiety which isn't self inflicted but just the way my brain has been wired so thankyou and i will keep in mind about everything you have said.
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A
female
reader, Abella +, writes (31 October 2011):
Well done that you have done all that your Doctors asked and that your situation is improving enough to get you back to school.
It has not been easy for you, I realise. But you want to go forward and you are motivated to make this work. Well done.
I hope you don't mind a suggestion or two?
One is that you first consider the possibility of going back to school PART-time not FULL-time?
I think full time is too big a stretch at this point.
Going back to school will be tiring and the last thing you need is to be over-confident and over-tired as it could end up making you feel stressed. And that will not help.
I hate to have to tell you this but teens in your age group can be ruthless. I think going back to the old school and the mean bullies will result in some pathetic name calling and stupid idiotic behavior from those who enjoy hurting others.
And certain places will remind you of past events
Therefore I suggest that you do try a new school at least one or two away from your existing school.
And you do not have to give a blow by blow description of why you changed schools. I mean a girl is allowed to change her mind. And so can you.
Start with a clean slate. Make sure the teachers have been prepped to consider your feelings and what a BIG step this is to go back to school.
Plus you do need to get plenty of rest. So no late nights :)
Avoid any idiots who ever dare to try to offer you any solace drugs (yes I know such idiots so exist)
And try this year to concentrate on your studies.
When I was your age we always got told to allow the girls who want to be 'notches' on a boys belt to do that. And instead be the smart girls who got the good marks. When the boys turn 18 they will start looking for the girls who have never been a notch on anyone's belt. And the boys will be nicer and kinder to those girls older than 16 than the younger boys were, back when those now 16 year old girls were 13, 14, 15.
And keep in touch with your therapist while you go through this transition time of returning to school.
And when you are home be very kind to you.
Find time to relax.
Run a scented bath
Ask someone at home to give you a foot massage
Keep on eating healthy
Never miss breakfast. Mine is a tub of yoghurt and a piece of fruit.
Never miss lunch.I love making wraps with tomato, mushroom, avocado, flaked almonds and fetta cheese
Find out who is the School Counsellor. Introduce yourself. Make time to speak to the counsellor if you need support.
Try to keep positive.
And just in case any bullying does surface (I hope not), but just in case please find the links below and I hope that are helpful.
Best Wishes.
Bullying links
http://bullyoffline.org/workbully/index.htm
http://www.overcomebullying.org/bullying-links.html
Bullying at school
http://www.bullying.com.au/school-bullying/index.php
Social network bullying
http://www.privacycom.org/content/release-19-child-safe
why do people bully
http://notcooltobecruel.com/why_do_people_bully.htm
Ostracism - ignoring and isolating a person
http://williams.socialpsychology.org/
http://www1.psych.purdue.edu/~willia55/Announce/cyberball.htm
Biderman’s Chart of Coercion – how an abuser does it
http://www.familyshelterservice.org/pdf/bidermans_chart_of_coercion.pdf
Helping parents understand social network bullying
http://raisingchildren.net.au/articles/media_teenagers.html/context/1108?s_kwcid=TC|14513|social%20networking||S|b|11519688691&gclid=CLD
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