A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hi ladies and gentlemen.I've known this girl for about a year now. I liked her from afar initially, knowing she has a boyfriend. We hit it off real well and everything, and after some time feelings between us develop, so to say. This is all with the backdrop of her being separate from her boyfriend due to her studies. She studies in the same school as I. He is home, while we are here.Eventually, we let our feelings for each other be known, and she seemed to waver in her relationship with him severely. Whether for me or not I do not know. We are really good friends first and foremost. She is an attractive girl with her past baggage aplenty. However, her relationship with her boyfriend, is in her words, 'she thought he was the one.' Down the road, we have sex a few times, but all with me feeling guilty and unsure. I owe him nothing. She owes me nothing. But i've been told in no uncertain terms that she loves me in my own way. She knows I feel torn up every time her boyfriend is mentioned. Now, we are home, and in this break, she has resumed her relationship with her boy full swing. He is actively in the game romancing the shit out of her. I can only stand by, seemingly only as a pathetic friend. We still text, talk, and meet up occasionally even. Are are good friends that unfortunately love each other or am I a fool for letting my heart get ripped out just as I lend mine to her when she was in need. I am waiting to move on. I know I can, hard and painful as it will be.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2015): move on mate because your her back up guy when things are going slow. you have much more to give and some woman will be wishing you would notice her, while your thinking about your best friend with benefits and she'll be thinking about her current partner whose probably thinking bout her until he starts noticing someone else.
A
female
reader, Anonymous 123  +, writes (26 July 2015):
 You had sex with a woman when you knew she had a boyfriend. If she was serious about you, she would have broken up with the other dude. She didn't and that shows what you mean to her. Either she doesn't love you or she sees him as a better option despite having feelings for you and thus chooses to be with him. Either way, you're not on the scene for her.
Chalk it up as a bad experience, learn from it and move on.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2015): Stop wavering and just move on. If she has returned to him, he is the one she really wants. You may have only caught her attention during her loneliest moments. Maneuvering and manipulating the situation like an opportunist. Hookups behind her boyfriend's back cheapens what you have together. It's nothing more than cheating. Don't you think it's best to love someone who is fully available without any unnecessary complications getting in your way? You're using your friendship as a disguise, and you're shamming her boyfriend.
That's a blight on your character as a man, my friend!
It may be hard, but it's best you leave her alone and stop adding to the problems between her and her boyfriend. You are being selfish, and trying to take what isn't yours. In the end, you'll get your heart broken; or there will be a time when you will meet your karma. Someday, you'll find what you think is the best love you've ever had; and another guy will go behind your back and steal her from you.
You'll recall what you've done; and it will hurt all the more. Leave her be, and find your own woman.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie  + ♥, writes (25 July 2015):
 If she hasn't left him yet, for you... then she isn't going to. And that is something YOU should have considered before getting involved emotionally and physically with a girl who has a BF.
And specially with a girl who is willing to cheat on her BF.
If she dumped him for you... HOW long do you think it would take before she got bored with you, and cheated with some other dude?
If you think she would never cheat on you... you are delusional.
I know you write that you OWE him nothing... No he is a total stranger to you... but... BEING a selfish bugger and sleeping with someone's GF makes you the bottom of the totem. The kinda lowlife who thinks of HIMSELF over everyone else. Even your post it's about YOU. There is no remorse for your actions, hardly any for hers. Because? YOU got sex fro ma girl you wanted... Unfortunately she doesn't WANT you as her BF, just as a friend she occasionally boinks.
She doesn't LOVE you, the way you love her.
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