A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Mum has issues me dating older lady. She's turning 36 and I am 32. She has a daughter about 10 years old. The relationship has been good. We have dated two years and my mum is totally against it. She feels she is way older and much too mature for me. I'd just like some people's thoughts and experiences with similar situations. She even told me that the lady may be too old to give me kids and that as a man I'd start having a wondering eye for younger women later on Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (15 September 2015): Hi amazing people. Thanks for the strong and encouraging words of wisdom. Just a quick update. it's been about 3 weeks since she told me that she was expectant. was really surprised and haven't told anyone yet till am sure the baby is totally fine. I'm scared and excited all in one. I am sticking with her all the way but don't know how to break the news to my family especially my mum given we aren't married n such.
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (27 July 2015):
 IF you like her and she likes you then enjoy.
FWIW I am 13 yrs older than my husband. But he never wanted children and I already had mine.
36 is not too old to have a baby.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (26 July 2015):
 I know that in your culture, a guy at your age typically go for much younger women (not underage ones), but you are who you choose to be. A man doesn't let his mom tell him what his weaknesses are or will be (i.e. predicting a wandering eye). Love is what you have for this woman of yours, and no pre-planned life will ever fill that hole if you choose to buckle under your mom's wishes.
Don't let anyone try to make you think that THEIR wishes are your responsibility. It is selfish of your mom to try to get you to fulfill her dreams for your reproduction.
Follow your heart, and stop letting her make you second-guess.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2015): You are old enough to make decisions on your own and date whomever you please. Your mother is entitled to her opinions; but as an adult, she is no longer responsible for your protection. Always value her advice, but you don't have to accept it unless it's useful. She is correct in everything she said; but that doesn't have to apply in your situation. It never hurts to listen and store it away. It may be true someday.
Parents love us and want the best for us. Once we are adults, we choose our mates and make our own decisions. Right or wrong. You can't always get their approval; there are times when they should just butt out. Be kind to your mother, and politely remind her you're a grown man; and it's up to you who you date and decide to marry. When you need her advice on love, you'll ask for it.
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A
female
reader, deirdre  +, writes (26 July 2015):
Hi, maybe your mum doesnt approve of the lady because she has a daughter already? Maybe she wants you to have a number of kids and she feels that this lady doesnt have much time left? In any case, if the lady is a respectable person there is no reason not to continue your relationship with her. You have been together/dating for 2 years now, you must have something special together if you are serious about her.
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A
female
reader, mystiquek +, writes (26 July 2015):
 Why at age 32 does your mother have so much influence over whom you date? A 4 year age difference and your mom is upset?? I don't see her reasoning. If the lady you are dating is good to you, makes you happy and isn't into drugs, drinking ect then your mom needs to keep her opinions to herself. You need to politely tell your mom that you have noted her opinion but won't let it influence you, you are old enough to make your own choices.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 July 2015): Dude... It's four years. That doesn't even count as an age gap. For all practical purposes you two are the same age bracket. Tell your mum to back off and let it go.
Be a man and stand up to your family.
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