A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:I recetntly found out that I am 6 weeks pregnant due to a one night stand. I have no idea how to break the news to everyone, especially the Daddy to be and my parents. I'm terrified because I have no idea how they will handle the news, my parents are expecting me to return to school and the daddy barely even knows me. I mean what if I end up in this alone, there is no way I could bring myself to abort the pregnancy. Any ideas of how to break the news?
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 March 2009): For telling your parents, put yourself in their shoes, and manage their expectations. The worst thing that could happen to my daughter is death. In the context of sex, the worst outcome is AIDS. If you can gently get them thinking in that direction, pregnancy won't be the end of the world. Yes, they'll be disappointed, yes, there may be angry words, but for most parents they'll come around to understanding that their little girl needs their love and support more than ever.
If you have no meaningful relationship with the child's father, and don't care to have one, and plan to give up the baby for adoption, you might consider not telling him. On the other hand, if you plan to keep the baby, he is obligated to help support it. Telling your parents should be job 1. Take everything else one step at a time.
Good luck.
A
female
reader, kaylynn  +, writes (19 March 2009):
 I wouldn't get an abortion if I were you b/c it's unreasponsible. So it's good your not getting one. I'm very specific with my views when it comes to abortion. In America, there are people who think abortion is wrong and should be illegal. My own opinion on this is: If you are still in High School/under 17, with a parent's written consent an abortion should be legal. Many students drop out and don't get their diploma or GED(therefore in the the future not being able to get a good job to support that child). If someone were to want an abortion and not be in High School/18+, I think it would be stupid. For one, that person is a grown and their own person. Second, they are adults and know the consequences.
On how to break it to your parents, sit them down and be honest with them. Don't raise your voice, it would only make things tense and make them want to raise theirs. Tell them how you plan to support yourself and the baby. Have a backup plan in case something goes wrong(they start hollering, etc,.) and also tell them what you plan to do with the child(keep it or give it up for adoption). If your not financially able to care for the baby, adoption might be best.
For the dad, be prepared to have a paternity test taken; he may not believe you. Do the same as you would to your prents: don't raise your voice, tell him your plans, etc,.
Good luck and I hope your parents and the father both understand.
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A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (18 March 2009):
You have said you could not have an abortion and that is fine as it is your choice and your body. But would you consider adoption? I am sure you could find a loving family for this baby and they could give it the best start in life and a stable, secure environment. You could write a letter for the parents to be able to give to him/her when they get old enough to have it all explained to them. Then the baby would have the choice to track you down and find out how you are if they choose to.
It's something to think about anyway.
Assuming you are going to keep it though:
Well for the dad, you just have to tell him straight, and if he wants to be a part of the babies life then great, and if not then he can just send a cheque once a month.
He's going to be the easier of the two. He'll probably be annoyed and may even demand a paternity test, which is hurtful but fair enough as you say he hardly knows you. He has no reason to trust you so allow him his doubts and don't take them personally.
Your parents are going to be the hardest to tell. But I very much doubt they would throw you out on the street. They may be disappointed but you could finish this year at school and then take next year off to go through the birth etc. It'll nearly be 1 by Sept 2010 so you could go back to school then.
Find a friend you trust and take them with you to tell your mum and dad.
You know them better than us so you will know if it's going to be easier to talk to one first or tell them both together.
You have a little bit of time before you start showing so the pressure is not on straight away.
Do some thinking, research your options, make your mind up about what you want to do with this baby and then tell them.
Good Luck!! xx
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A
female
reader, Pyro_Dimples +, writes (18 March 2009):
 Just be straight babe... in this situation it's truly hard to not get a negative response. You have to be strong and take responsibility for your actions. If you do end up in it alone human resource offices help out alot. I would tell the daddy to be first and see if he is in it with you or if he is a ass and is going to bail. The from there move to your parents. good luck sweetheart. I hope it all works out.
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A
female
reader, kaylagal +, writes (18 March 2009):
 These are the consequences to your actions. Call him up, meet and tell him. There is no easy way of doing it. As for your parents, there's no easy way to tell them either, you might want to leave out that the father was just a one night stand.
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