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male
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anonymous
writes: Been with this girl for 6 months now and sex between us has slowed down to the point that it is unhealthy. In the last month and 1/2 we had sex like 3 times. When ever I start to make an advance on her she tells me that she doesn't want to get started but I do the little things for her and take care of her needs even when I don't feel like it. I'm not being selfish but damn what do I have to do to get some. This relationship seems to be one sided if you ask me. Now I don't know what she's doing, who she is doing, or what games she is playing but very soon I'm going to find my joy some place else. She really hasn't been on her job as being a girlfriend lately' or is she taking me for granted. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2008): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionI want to thank all of you who replied to my question all of your advice was very helpful.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (16 July 2008):
 How old are both of you?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (16 July 2008): I used to be in the same situation as you. Some girls just don't care to have sex. In my case she never really seemed to enjoy the intercourse part of it. I don't think we really fit together right. She could only orgasm if I went down on her or she used a vibrator. She wasn't that affectionate either. So if she didn't need a boyfriend to get off, what did she need me for? Dinner, theatre tickets, Someone to talk too, icecream, someone to shop with, someone to help fold laundry, etc. I was exactly like you. I never pushed for sex and I always bent over backwards to make her feel like a princess.There are terms for guys like us... doormats.Never again. After I finally had enough, I found a girlfriend that has a higher sex drive than I do.I can barely keep up now. Its amazing!Move on. Sex is way too important in a relationship. Find someone who is compatable with you in this area.
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A
female
reader, bubbloo24  +, writes (16 July 2008):
 Have you even talked to her about this?
Have you thought that something might be upsetting her?
It may be because you're constantly trying to impose sex on her, have you thought about that?
She may not feel respected or want to give you sex because she feels that this is the only thing on your mind.
Talk to her and ask her if something is upsetting her because I'm sure saying "I'm going to have sex elsewhere if you don't give it to me" is not very respectful in a relationship is it?It definately won't help the situation and then she'll feel even less liable to give you sex, or the other way around - she will feel forced to give it to you and I definitely wouldn't take this route.
How are you supposed to know what's going on her head if you haven't talked to her about it?
"What do I have to do to get some?" Perhaps maybe treat her with some respect and not talk through your dick but from your heart.
"The relationship seems one sided if you ask me"
If you ask me, it sure does from where I am.
Talk to her.
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A
male
reader, BenQ  +, writes (16 July 2008):
 I'm not 100% aware of your situation, so i comment merely on what I have taken from what you have written.
You seem to be putting so much focus on sex sex sex. Perhaps your girlfriend of 6 or so months is wondering if she means more to you than "just a hole".
Now, because she's laid off on the sex, you say you're contemplating going elsewhere? Have you thought that maybe this is exactly what she is trying to find out?
You say you treat her nicely and go out of your way to do the "little things" for her, but if she sees it as a means to an end (i.e. you're only doing it to get sex) she might feel a little de-valued.
Think about it, and sit down with her and have a talk about it.
And think how you'd feel if you were her, and read your question here. "What do I have to do to get some"...
Sounds a little selfish to me.
That's just my two cents.
BenQ
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A
female
reader, Chatterbox  +, writes (16 July 2008):
 to be perfectly honest why are you asking us that sorta stuff should be between you and your girlfreind. If you cant talk about this sort of stuff that makes you feel upset or neglected and let her know and comprmise then it aint a very good relationship. She might not even know you feel this way sometime guys are really hard to read! talk to her and sort it out thats the only way really
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