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*herrybaby39
writes:I have problem, my live in husband wont kiss or hug me or even touch me in any kind of way, what can I do, what can I say, he hasnt touched me in over six months! please help could he be cheating on me, we are 48 years old and shouldnt we still be touching and hugging and kissing? help me please, cherrybaby39
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reader, sf69 +, writes (9 September 2009):
Im a little younger than you but this sounds just like somthing a close friend told me (they are a 10 year coupple) He said (we havent had sex in 6 months...whats wrong?) I didnt have any new formula or anything to offer him. Several weeks later he told me he and his wife (got away) went to the casino got a room and they "did it" a lot. I think just doing enjoyable things together (think back there were some) will rekindle that flame. Even if that wont work in the sex department youll have some fun. I hope this helps.
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male
reader, softtouchmale2003 +, writes (8 September 2009):
 Its a good question you have there.
How much time do the two of you spend together? Is it an hour or two each day, what about the weekends? The more time you spend together, doing things together, the more likely he's going to feel closer to you.
He could be having an affair, or he could be bored. The other issue is whether or not he's having some sort of midlife crisis or going through some sort of physical change.
Ask him why he won't be affectionate to you. Try and hug him. Try and get close to him and keep trying to get through. It could be he's having some sort of issues in his own mind, whatever it is, you need to look at him positively.
Assuming he is having an affair, try not to be angry, jealous or judge him. You want to find out why and what the two of you could do to make things right in your marriage. Don't use anything like that as a weapon. Use it as a lesson learned and how to avoid it in the future.
It seems to me that you have a great deal of emotion invested in your marriage and I am certain that you're looking to rekindle the intimacy that you deserve.
As far as your age, you should be touching and hugging and very close. It seems at this time of your lives, this is actually the best time to rediscover intimacy and sexuality.
There are other things to look out for. Is he depressed at all? Is he sweating profusely especially when he's napped or gone to sleep? Is he starting to act confused, moody or distant and he can't say why and he doesn't know why?
This could be a problem with hormones or some other medical condition. I know in my case, in the last couple of years, I've been going through a roller coaster with this and its sort of a change in your body. Your butt gets flatter, and you sweat a lot especially behind the neck and down the middle of your back when you sleep. Sleep gets disturbed for any reason.
You want sex, and it can be tremendous, but then you feel drained and don't want it and want it again a little later but feel disappointed in yourself. The consistency isn't there anymore and you get moody and impatient a lot. I know other guys that get crazy about this time and still others that never notice anything at all.
Whatever it is that he's going through, communications, patience, love, forgiveness and a great deal of care plays into this.
If he needs to see someone about it, go with him and make sure he knows you're there for him. Be affectionate with him. Touch him, kiss him even if he doesn't want to reciprocate. He probably needs it if he hasn't cheated on you. And he's just been depressed and moody.
It just takes a lot of work at this point. It sounds to me like you care a great deal and whatever it is, I am certain if you're determined to keep him and make him better at it, then you'll start building that intimacy back in no time.
The only other thing is if he's really out there, then you have to ask him what it is he wants in his life. It could be he just wants his freedom and he's afraid to hurt you.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2009): I def think he could be cheating! but also he could have a personal issue maybe he isn't 2 comfortable with his self .i think talking 2 him will give u sum idea wats going on.u should first try turning things up get a sexy out fit maybe he just need sum excitement
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