A
male
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hey 32 yr old male here..quick story and I need some honest advice...been with this girl for 8 mo now and things have gotten pretty seious..i feel like she is a great girl all around..i am a very busy guy at this time in my life..2 jobs, 2 houses and i work my ass off! she seems to be into it, but is unwilling to fully committ to move here (she lives and hour away)..i am fidning it hard to understand her position on some things and have been thinking about ending it..i have had many conversations with her about how i want her here, i need her help with things, ect ect..we see each other once a week usually..she often has to work on saturday and doesn't get up to my place until late..she sometimes brings up that she wants to go away for the weekend to visit friends and does it..i feel that being in our early to mid thirties we should be working on cementing our relationship, being fully involed with the impt stuff and not so much worried about how many weeks we haven't hung out with our friends. i am a hard worker who worries about the future and will do eveything it takes to ensure that i am comfortable and secure in the future..she on the other hand doesn't make alot of money, lives in a small apt and has no health ins..i find it ridiculous that someone who doesn't have their life together at this age can still find the time to go away for the weekend and not worry about securing their life..i have bought this up and it hasn't gone over so well. i think that she should be with me, helping "us", trying to get her job in order, ect ect rather than hanging out for a whole weekend..my position is that you have to be secure in things and work your butt to make it in this world and if that means fixing the house or sweeping leaves in the driveway, well than i don't have time to "hang out" right now in my life..am i wrrong here
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reader, anonymous, writes (25 October 2009): You sound like a very demanding man, may be she doesn't want to be w/someone like you, i wouldn't
A
male
reader, CaringGuy  +, writes (25 October 2009):
There might be something in her past that makes her feel she has to take her time. 8 months isn't as long as it seems, so why don't you try talking to her. Tell her you love her and would love her to consider moving in with you. If she says no, ask her why she feels that way and really listen to her.
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