A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey Cupids,me and my bf have currently been discussing getting engaged to a point where i even heard him talking to his mom about rings. Im in my sophmore year of college and he is a freshman in college as well. We have been living together for about a year now and things have been going good. But is getting engaged too early right now? Im 20 and hes 19. Obviously i dont plan on getting married asap possibly a year or two down the road. We have been together 4 years and have often talked about out future together. What do you guys think? Thanks!
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female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (26 July 2012):
 What would change in the relationship if you got engaged?
You are together 4 years
you live together
you don't plan to marry soon...
I personally am not a big believer in long engagements so I wonder what would getting engaged now and not even setting a wedding date do for the relationship?
Why has it become an issue?
A
female
reader, Deagan +, writes (26 July 2012):
 I agree with iamheretohelpyou, go with the flow and if he does propose, that's great, just make it a long engagement. Make an agreement that although engaged, wait to finish college and then get married. College can be a life altering experience, it's when you really start to discover yourself. It's very possible the two of you might change. So again, just go with the flow.
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A
male
reader, Serpico +, writes (26 July 2012):
I dont believe people should be getting engaged (or having children) until they are completely financially independent. Being married and having children are mature acts. Being financially dependent on others is sign of immaturity.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 July 2012): My younger brother got engaged at 19. We were all pretty critical at first, but they had a longer engagememt, he is now 22. They got married tgis weekend, it was a beautiful ceremony and they looked so happy and in love...putting us all to shame for having doubts! Getting engaged is just the next step and another symbol of your love and commitment for eachother...
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A
male
reader, dougbcoll +, writes (26 July 2012):
 your boyfriend and you need to decide together what the future holds for the both of you, and no one else.
like aunt honesty said follow your heart and not to listen to anybody else.
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A
female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (26 July 2012):
 I think you should follow your heart and not listen to anybody else. It is your life to live. My personal opinion is that you have both been together quite a while now, and you have lived together for a year as well, so it is not as if you are rushing in to anything. I don't see the harm in getting engaged. Yes you are still young I understand that, but as you said you both would not be rushing in to a wedding therefore I say why not! Good luck and all the best.
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A
female
reader, Kittykatt988 +, writes (26 July 2012):
I don't think a relationship is much different from a steady commited relationship. As long as you are both comfortable it just adds a new label with marriage at the end. May I perhaps suggest a long long Long engagement. You have to be sure and you are questioning it. I've been engaged young I was 18 and it didn't work for us. And we broke up. Best of luck
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