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age
41-50,
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writes: I asked a male friend of mine on FB to do some snoop work for me about a potential future boyfriend. The chap who wanted to help me ended up receiving an actual message from the guy (bf) in question telling him that a little bird told him that he's researching him. Should the chap I assigned him with the spying task reply to the message or just ignore him? And what should I say if the potential bf ever asks me about the spy ( he can still see him in my friends' list) so I can't deny I know him. I don't want to play more games at the same time I don't think telling the truth is the best option here either. SHould I just tell him that he was a random add or what? please help x Reply to this Question
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female
reader, Missy123  +, writes (10 February 2012):
Honestly I spent about 45 mins today looking around the Internet for Info and more background info about my new interest just to see if there was anything I needed to know out that may jeaporize my safety or well- being.
Now i prolly wouldnt own up to having a "spy" but I wouldnt completely deny checking out his past info. Just say you google his name and you did your research or tried to at least...just in case. He shouldn't be major upset about it, people do this all the time...
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female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (3 February 2012):
 One thing is doing a background check but ask friends to spy? Sorry, what are you? 7?
Yes, own up to it or continue with the childish games. Up to you.
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female
reader, Sugarbuns  +, writes (3 February 2012):
 Ignore it. Definately.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2012): I think she gets it by now, it was a bit of an immature thing to do!! Give her a break! I'm sure we have all done things regarding the opposite sex that now make us cringe?! What's done is done...
If he asks I would own up and apologise to him and say you were a bit too shy to ask directly yourself!
(Also you CAN hide you friends list from people ya know)
:-)
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male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (2 February 2012):
 I'm considerably older than 35 and if I was in the dating scene I would expect women to check my background.
I'm pretty sure Not telling the truth is a bad idea as well.
He already knows.
FA
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (2 February 2012):
 If the potential boyfriend isn't a complete moron, he'll put two and two together...and find out it's you that is nonchalantly stalking him. Then he'll never even consider you as a FWBs, let alone a relationship.
Call off your Inspector Gadget and do your own dirty work. Go the old fashioned route, talk, flirt, and chase the guy if you want him.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2012): Hold on a minute! You asked a man to "spy" on another man for you, and now you're not sure what to say about it but are pretty sure you shouldn't tell the truth?
Please, grow up! It was very immature to ask someone to spy for you. Making it worse is that you don't want to own up to it now that your plot has been discovered. That's more than enough to chase away many good men.
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female
reader, celtic_tiger  +, writes (2 February 2012):
 Are you really 30-35 years old?
Spying on potential boyfriends? I suspect should he find out then that will have blown any chances you might have of getting to know him. He will probably be freaked out by this!
You are a grown woman, if you like this man, talk to him.
Your poor male friend is now in a potentially difficult and embarassing situation. Take responsibility for your actions.
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (2 February 2012): sounds intriguing. if you want to avoid the drama and suspense, just send him a message and say, hey, want to meet up for a coffee sometime? its worth a try.
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