A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:well I seen the bus driver I have a crush on who I think is about 36, I am 33. he is always shy but extra nice towards me and talks very low and mild mannered….so as I am getting on the bus today, he just cheeses and grins with all 32 teeth and says awww u shouldn’t have n proceeded to ask me was that package I had for him, I said no this is mine all giddy and he laughed and I said my boss gave this 2 me as a gift…all the folks on the bus just lol and smiled at the two of us and the bus driver said congrats and I said thanks and as I was about 2 get off the bus he just kept staring at me and smiling and said loudly/confidently for the first time ever have a great day while still smiling. i proceeded to say thanks and i asked will you be driving again next week, he said yes smiling. i said ill bring you a Christmas card he said okay, okay extra happy smiling with all 32 teeth showing…i was wondering what could i write in the card that’ll grasp his attention and let him know i wouldn’t mind getting to know him outside of the bus route…..I think there is a mutual attraction here. I was thinking of writing in a Christmas card, me and you coffee ? (im not a coffee drinker but I don't mind trying something diff) and write down my name and number and leave the rest up to him…or is that too much?
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christmas, crush, my boss, shy Reply to this Question
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female
reader, aunt honesty  +, writes (21 December 2016):
 Are you sure this man is single? I mean a lot of bus drivers are very flirty, it is all part of their job description to have a bit off banter with passengers. Sure write him a card but don't ask him on a date.
A
female
reader, Eagle'sfan1986 +, writes (21 December 2016):
Can I ask you something but not to be mean about it at all? What if you two started dating eachother if he gets the Xmas card from you and it won't work out on the first date and you keep on riding the bus. It could make things very awkward between you both. But if you want go go for it then give it a try. Has the bus driver given you hints to show you that he is attactive towards you?
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 December 2016): Hello,I think you should go to him and say what you feel about him, maybe he feels the same way about you.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2016): I think you should just send him a nice friendly Christmas card (but nothing flirty) - that way if he's interested he should follow it up himself :)
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A
female
reader, chigirl  +, writes (19 December 2016):
 *don't put him on the spot
lol, autocorrect is messing up my posts lately... Hope you get what I mean!
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A
female
reader, Nittynora  +, writes (19 December 2016):
 Well I WOULD send him a card you said you would, so do so. Okay so he MAY be married and have children but that is up to him not to take it any further. You cant go through life thinking oh he may be this or that. Just send him a Christmas card DONT invite him anywhere for coffee. If he wants to ask you out he can just as easy send you a card with an invite in. Try and find out his name and do some research on him. Merry Christmas x
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A
female
reader, chigirl +, writes (19 December 2016):
I think it's already obvious you both want more, unless he's just an odd duck who is extremely nice and charming. Which could be, they're just rare.
Im just saying this because I work in a profession where I also meet and greet a lot of people every day, and I have been asked out several times already, when I haven't intended on ever meeting anyone outside of my work.
So, since Im sort of on the other side of the fence here, I can tell you what I think you should do in this situation. Do not put him on the stop! Because this is his job, and he can't exactly ignore you or stop driving you on the bus. He's pretty much stuck there, forced to be around you if you choose to get on the bus. So you're the free moving object here, and he's the one who is stuck. Just keep that in mind. You have already started the initial approach, and he's reciprocated. A Christmas card is fine! But that's a big enough gesture in itself, you do not need to add more. Dont make it a particularly flirty one, just a nice card.
Write something generic and instead you use the opportunity when you give him the card, to ask more about him. Ask normal things that will give him the opportunity to say more. Such as "are you spending the holiday with family" or "do you have to work during Christmas"... These questions will let him know you want to get to know him, and he can choose to answer politely or to tell you more about him.
Then you follow up later on with questions about the information he gave you last time. Such as "Im celebrating with my grandma" and next time you see him "how is your grandma doing?"
I think you need to let HIM come up with a way to give you his number, or for HIM to be the one to take that initial step of asking you out, unless you can convey it in a clever manner so that it sounds completely casual. This is just because he's the one who's there at work, and you're not. You need to respect that this is his place of work and let him come to you.
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A
female
reader, [?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] +, writes (19 December 2016):
![[?]BitterSweetFinale;[?] agony aunt](/avatars/7bb1e9ea-6c2f-43b8-a4f7-0635b7eff08c.png) As the others have said, you may be misinterpreting his behavior as something completely different. Sometimes we flirt without even realizing we're flirting. That's not to say you shouldn't give him a nice holiday card. You totally should, it's the spirit after all. :)
Just be courteous as to how you word it, he could very well be in a long term relationship, or seeing someone. Tell him he is funny and that you wish him happy holidays. I'm not sure what else to say, just be careful with how you come across. It could rub him the wrong way.
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female
reader, Youcannotbeserious +, writes (19 December 2016):
 Take it from someone whose brother is a bus driver: flirting is part of the job (on good days). My brother is older than this guy, in a happy relationship, but flirts with many of his regulars to pass the time, especially at this time of year.
If you really want to send him a Xmas card, I would put something like "Thank you for brightening up my journeys. Hope you have a lovely Christmas." If you put your contact details in and he has only been what he thought was friendly, it will make future journeys awkward, which I am sure you would not want.
If he is genuinely interested - and free - this will hopefully give him the green light to take things further.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (19 December 2016):
 I would NOT write and ask him out for coffee - the guy could be married with 10 kids for all you know or maybe just a GF or fiance.
And I agree IF you end up giving him a Christmas Card make it platonic and Christmassy.. not use it as a way to try and pick up your bus driver.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2016): He may just be a friendly guy who notices you as a regular passenger, and offers you a friendly flirt to make your day. I think you should know whether or not he's taken before writing anything too flirtatious in your card. For the time being, just keep it generic. Tame your flirtations until you're certain whether he's just a big flirt, has no wife or girlfriend; and really has a genuine crush on you.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (19 December 2016):
 He is a friendly, jolly bus driver, its possible that is who he is and that his smiles and banter are just who he is. You haven't said if you know anything else about him .. he might be married and have children, you need to be very careful how you approach him, if you HAVE to give him a Christmas card keep the message innocuous, and then try and find out a bit more about him before you issue invites to coffee or anything else.
Good luck
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