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Should I walk away if he got another girl pregnant?

Tagged as: Cheating, Pregnancy, Troubled relationships<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (25 December 2009) 12 Answers - (Newest, 27 December 2009)
A female United States age 41-50, anonymous writes:

hello im just wondering what i should do.my boyfriend of 5years got another girl pregnant an it hurts me soo much cause i was there an he didnt want me to have mine.but allowing this girl to have her baby.he say he love me an want to work it out wit me but it hurts to know he going to the doctors appt with her an the class like he with her.this his first child an he dont what to mis out on antthing i try to understand n be there for him, but he could have done the same for me. i know we was not ready at the time but now this girl going to be the first wow im thinking about just walking away.but trying to show him im there nomatter what.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2009):

run as fast as u can

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (27 December 2009):

My boyfriend of 20 years got a girl pregnant earlier this year -- he has been cheating on me with this whore for at least 12 years. We have a child, his first kid, 11 years old. I found out about this other relationship when I was 4 months pregnant with our child. When I found out his whore was pregnant, he tried to tell me he wasn't sure if the baby is his. The baby is 3 months now. He tells me he hasn't seen the baby (which is b/s) and that he is going to take a dna test. It doesn't matter, he still cheated. Everytime I found out he cheated on me w/ her over the past 12 years, he either denied it or told me he would never do it again & that it was over. I stayed with him through the years b/c i wanted to work things out for the sake of our child -- and look where it has gotten me. I have filed for child support, I am walking away and praying that karma takes care of him. I am a beautiful and intelligent woman and I know I deserve so much better, not to mention that he doesn't deserve to be with a woman like me. He sucks as a father to our kid and I know he'll suck as a father to this other kid. It is however unfortunate that I allowed myself to be taken through this for so long. I am frustrated but I know I deserve so much better. Good luck...and please, don't waste another minute of your time. It does hurt, but at least I know that in due time it will get better. I know if I stay then this is what I will go through the rest of my life. The point that I want to make to you is I stayed with someone who cheated on me and look where it got me...more bullshit.

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A female reader, boo22 United Kingdom +, writes (26 December 2009):

boo22 agony auntHi, I can tell from your post you want to stay with him. Well, my friends daughter was in a similar position.

Her boyfriend got another girl pregnant and she stayed with him and 6 months after his first kid was born, she got pregnant as well.

Now, both girls have a child by him and they are equal.

Both girls are constantly in a battle for his attention and affection, not to mention money.

Their lives are miserable. He loves neither one and everyone sees it except them.

Please dump him x

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (26 December 2009):

Okay, I'm assuming he cheated? You should dump him just for that!!! To be in a five year relationship, then be cheated on is just a waste of your time and effort, I'm sorry to say. And then to have well "made" you have an abortion, (although in the end it was ultimately your choice)but "let"(you can't really force an abortion, but you can manipulate and pursaude and make your partner feel like they are ruining your life if you have the child, I know, my ex did the exact same thing to me) the woman he cheated on you with have his baby... Well thats just plain and simply not right, ethical, or moral. He can grow up on his own, with out you. You deserve so much better. Run away and don't look back, or ever allow yourself to be treated that way again.

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (26 December 2009):

Don't walk away.

RUN!

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A female reader, bOy CrAzY;} United States +, writes (26 December 2009):

Walk away. He's not worth your time. When a man has a kid he can't walk away from it. That's what my dad told me happened with him. He didn't cheat but he knocked my mom up when she was a sophmore or juniour I'm not sure but anyways once he saw me when I was born at first he was gunna walk away. But he didn't cause he saw how little interest my mother had in me. And ya but my point is this kid and woman are gunna be his whole life. So walk away find a better man:):):()

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A female reader, Sweet-thing United Kingdom +, writes (25 December 2009):

Sweet-thing agony auntGet out. He's a loser. There is nothing else to do or say. You deserve better.

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A female reader, sunnycomet Canada +, writes (25 December 2009):

sunnycomet agony auntI agree with CaringGuy, I think you should walk away now. He has a baby with another women and now that women and their baby will come first. You deserve better then this. Good Luck and if you ever want to talk just e-mail me.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 December 2009):

I think you should leave him, too. First off, he cheated, and that is a total deal breaker, if you ask me. Second, how can he expect you to go through all this over something that is entirely his fault! That is just wrong!

Don't be there for him no matter what, because he hasn't been there for you no matter what. Don't put yourself through all this pain for a guy that is a total jerk. You can do so much better. You deserve a guy that REALLY loves you.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 December 2009):

Yes, let me guess...he told you it would never happen again and it was a huge mistake and you were the only one for him? If he can do it once, he will do it again. Getting her pregnant! that's too far, he will spend all the time with the son or daughter that isnt even yours...which means he will be spending time with her, and when your forced to spend time with someone a relatioship grows. Your going to get hurt in the end, sorry that this has happened, good luck.

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A female reader, anonymous, writes (25 December 2009):

You are feeling sad because you are missing out on him and I'm afraid things are not going any better. You can't be selfish and ask him to break all ties with the mother of his baby and the baby either. At the same time, you'll feel really disappointed and upset with how things are. Stay with him if you want to sign up for more heartache. Give him up if you still want a future with you and another guy having your own family.

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A male reader, CaringGuy United Kingdom +, writes (25 December 2009):

Personally, I would walk away now and find someone else. That may sound harsh, I don't know. but if he really loved you, he wouldn't have cheated and he wouldn't have not had a baby with you. You need to realize the child will be the biggest part of his life. He will have to keep it, visit it, have it visit both him and you. It's a big commitment to a man who didn't care about you enough. Think carefully.

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