A
female
age
36-40,
*icci_m_spen
writes:Ok Im thinkin of getting into a relationship with an older married man, his wife is very ill and will soon pass away, and he is very lonely and is looking for a friendship and possibly more, should i go for it or tell him friendship only? i want to get to know him, btw im 22 and he's is in his 40's.
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2010): i find it hard to believe you want to be with a guy who wants to abandon his dying wife.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2010): Jeeez! At least wait until she has died.
Imagine if you were dying, AND the love of your life was cheating on you!
Wow, no offence, but I don't know how you can even think of doing that to a dying woman
You will be his rebound, no matter whether you like it or not.
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A
female
reader, KRSMouse  +, writes (12 December 2010):
His poor wife! If I were you i'd think about how you'd feel on your deathbed if you then found out your husband who should be supporting and caring for you until the end, was dating a much younger woman!
That aside, if he wants to cheat on her, and especially given the circumstances, then he is a total rat. And if he has it in him to cheat on his dying wife, you can be rest assured he's probably got it in him to cheat on you too.
If you really like this guy, then get to know him as a friend. If his wife is going to pass soon anyway, then once she does and he is a single man, then its a different ball game. In the meantime, I'd consider whether you think getting into a relationship with a guy who could do that is really the kinda guy you want a relatonship with, and also show some respect for your gender, especially given her unfortunate circumstances.
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A
female
reader, SmilySmily  +, writes (12 December 2010):
Well, I don't know why you want to ask that to others? how do you feel about him? do you fancy him? do you like him? How did you actually meet him if he's married man with a very ill wife? I personally don't think he'd want more than a friendship at this time with his wife being very ill and all.
You dont need to say it like going 'oh no just friendship only'...see how it goes but like why would you even go for it? would you not feel awkard seeing him when his wife is very ill and probably will pass away soon?
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