A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:none of the names I use here r real. I use them for the sake of easy following of my story. Im Dana. I go to his chool as a freshman. There's this guy I met this year (we went to different middle schools) named Joe. He's GREAT. Funny, smooth, cute, slightly muscular, thoughtful, fun, popular, social, kind and generous. I mean Mr Perfect in every sense of the word. Im not some quiet, awkward girl w/a crush on the popular guy in school. That is SO clichè. Im popular, loud and fun loving, like him. I know Im not ugly since guys drool over me.Even Joe has complimented me many times. But I've become close w/some girls from IEY (the middle school Joe went to) and they all say: "I love Joe, but I think he's so above me. Id date him again, but Im always so afraid I'm not enough." Im very independant and free willed, but I WANT him SO BAD. But if I feel intimidated I wont be happy. But he's perfect. Despite all the girls he's dated, none of them have anything negative to say. All I ever hear is "He treated me like a queen and "Omigod I hope he's walking over here to talk to me" from exes and otherwise. He has this not as popular friend, JP. JP and Joe are best friends. JP is funnier than Joe, but in a crude way. Joe makes me laugh in a suave, make-me-blush way. JP makes me laugh in a crude oh-crap-I'm-going-to-hell-for-laughing-at-that way. JP is not smooth in the longest stretch of imagination. But he's adorable in a lost-puppy way and he definitely wants me. But if I date one and find he's not the one, I cant date the other or else create a rift in their friendship. And I need to figure this out quickly. I'm afraid Joe might ask me out soon and JP wont ask me out (no self confidence). Joe or JP? Intimidating Mr Perfect or Odd Guy JP?
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2010): i dont think you should date jp if you like his friend more. jp is a really nice guy it sounds like hed make a great friend, but it would probley hurt him, hes someone who cares about you, if you later on date his friend after turning him down. id say unless jp can earn you completely then your not going to know if if its worth messing up your chances for being with joe. so i wouldnt date jp unless i was very sure it would be just as great as it would be with joe. but if he has a great heart, he might be worth the try if you give him a chance. crushes are fun to have, and if it dont work between you and joe, if you got with him in the future, and then you'll have lost the having a crush feeling and a guy who likes you or a good guy friend-or two
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reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2010): god I wish this was about me :) I think I am more of the "JP" minus the crude jokes but I try to be funny to bad for me it didn't end up working and the girl I like is dating one of my best friends. I feel like Im a lot like "JP" with the low self confidence but its only around this particular girl. Mr. Perfect is the sweet guy that would probably be good to you but having several past relationships might be of concern. I feel like I am also "Joe" because I would do anything for this girl and she knows it. And I like listening to her she just doesn't like listening to me Im pretty sure. JP probably won't ask you out not so much with the low self confidence but more so that he likes you so much that he builds you up in his head to being a perfect girl and he is now afraid to ask you. That is the best description I can give you of what I did to this girl I liked.
I think "joe" would be a good guy for you but at the same time "JP" would probably be super happy and might not show it but I have a feeling he likes you a lot.
Its very sweet to read what you have written about Joe either way someone will be very lucky to have a girl like you.
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