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male
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*rankie z
writes:Ive been divorced from my wife for 20 yrs. Two years ago she asked me to teach her to ride a motorcycle,work on her car ect... I pretty sure she was looking to see if we could re light that flame but I blew it off like no big deal. Now 2 yrs later I still dream about her and want her big time. Should I just leave it alone ?
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reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2011): It's hard to say without knowing more about your situation, but my initial reaction is "go for it"!
I met my fiance about 8 years ago. We had a child together, but we broke up and spent several years in and out of court arguing about custody issues and so on. Although we hadn't gotten along very well, I had always been very attracted to her and I couldn't get her out of my mind either. The spark never died.
About a year ago I said what the hell, gave her a call, and asked her if she'd consider going out to dinner and doing some things with me. It wasn't all roses, but we worked through the issues and grew much closer than we ever had been. I just proposed to her, and she was literally jumping for joy.
It can happen. I say it's worth taking a chance. Life's too short to sit around wondering about what might have been.
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reader, FloridaCatGirl +, writes (15 February 2011):
 Are both of you single? If so, what do you have to lose? You're older and wiser now, so maybe things will work out this time. Good luck!
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female
reader, DrPsych  +, writes (15 February 2011):
 It really depends on what brought you both to divorce in the first place. If you think you are both different people from what you were back then (e.g. more mature, more respectful) then why not see if the flame is still glowing? This depends on you both being single and not 'settling' for each other in the absence of other options. It sounds like your ex was looking for a friendship at the very least if she wished to spend time with you. It sounds like you are now keen. Perhaps it is time to pick up the phone and give her a call to see how she is doing?
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