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female
,
anonymous
writes: After having an affair with a married man for three and a half years, am I a fool for trusting his word on anything? I have just found e-mail correspondence from him to another young woman which seems perfectly innocent, but is this man incapabale of honesty? I find it hard to believe that someone can be such a convincing liar, or is it that when he speaks of his love for me he has an alternative definition in mind?
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reader, anonymous, writes (8 September 2006): Hun, you are fully aware that the both of you have chosen to do something which is wrong. Both of you have chosen to carry on in a relationship that is wracked with deceit and with a man that lacks integrity.. Now you ask, if this man is incapable of honesty? I think you know the answer. Your history with him, speaks for itself. Now, you have found he is corresponding with a young female. I wouldn't trust his words of undying love as far as I can throw him. If he's corresponding with a female, and it was innocent, why didn't he just tell you he had a friendship with her? This is just my opinion, but he sounds like the kind of man who is looking to replace you. In other words, he is willing to lose you. If he is willing to lose you, then he doesn't love you. If he loved you, losing you would be the one thing he would never, ever want to do. Shaky trust issues are dominating this relationship. Until you decide to do what is right, nothing good will come of this. The only path to your happiness will come from making right choices. Good luck, dear
A
female
reader, Green_Eyez +, writes (8 September 2006):
You say you find it difficult to believe he can be such a convincing liar, yet how do you imagine he's managed to keep your very lengthy affair a secret from his wife?????
This man cannot be trusted and you should get rid of him. He say's he loves you, yet he's kept you on the sidelines of his life for over 3 years. Hardly the actions of a guy madly in love. He's having his cake and eating it and by letting him get away with this terrible behaviour you are disrespecting yourself and his poor wife.
Do yourself a favour, if you are looking for honesty and trust, find someone who will commit fully.
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A
female
reader, bonym  +, writes (7 September 2006):
 Dear, you are sleeping with a man who is MARRIED to another woman, how can he possibly not be a liar, he is already lying to his family, so what makes you think he isnt doing it to you?
My dear, I think you have already answered your question. xXx
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A
female
reader, pica +, writes (7 September 2006):
Can you trust him? Well, his wife can't so why should you be able to? Or anyone else he has his eye on for that matter?
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (5 September 2006): We all like to think we are special in some way, and there is nothing wrong with that.
So when someone with a questionable history, such as your mans, cheats on his wife to be with you, and fills your head with words like "I love you like no one else" you rightly think that they have changed for you; that it is that they weren't with the right person before.
But in this respect you are no different from any one else. If a man cheats on a women to be with you, he'll most likely cheat on you to be with another women. It's in their nature. It's not your fault - but in future - you must judge people more strongly if you want to consider them as a partner. If you meet a married man, he will seperate and divorce her to be with you if he really thought you were special.
There are exceptions to this. But, generally speaking, people have a nature and no individual will change that.
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A
male
reader, gladyz +, writes (5 September 2006):
having an affair with a MARRIED MAN for 3 1/2 years and now you find out that he also having a little secret about another woman' you think you can still trust this man? i dont think so'' beside he is a married man' do you wanna stay with this situation for all of your life? i think its hard! why not try to step out of this situation.i guess its more better for you now and in the future. good luck...
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A
female
reader, shania +, writes (5 September 2006):
 Married men have to be very good liars because to having a mistress,they need to have a good memory otherwise their lies get found out,saying that,there is a lot of them that do get caught out.You said he spoke of undying love for you,yet he didn't leave his wife? Thats because he was driven by sex,nothing more and nothing less.The email you found could of been innocent but to be honest i think i would of had my doubts.Still,it doesn't matter now because your not with him no more...i would learn that as a lesson in future and just stick to single men.
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