A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:A mutual friend of my girlfriend and I recently told me that she doesn't like my girlfriend at all. My girlfriend always talks about how much she likes this friend and invites her out all the time. Should I tell my girlfriend? I feel like I'm lying to her if I don't, but I don't want to hurt her feelings. Reply to this Question
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female
reader, nicola79  +, writes (22 May 2007):
 well yes i would tell your gf. why is this "friend" saying this about her. its not nice and maybe she may be doing this because she has a crush on you???
you need to tell your gf because if she finds out from someone else and finds out that you know,it will be terrible for her.
you need to be telling this other girl to keep away if she doesnt like your gf,and maybe hand out with people she does like.
nicola.xxxxx
A
male
reader, Frank B Kermit  +, writes (22 May 2007):
 If it was me, I would want to know, as I would feel like a fool speaking well of someone that trashed me.
Also, my guess is that this female friend might have the hots for YOU, and sees your girlfriend as Competition for your attentions.
Make a choice. Her or the Girlfriend. Who has your loyality?
-FBK
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A
female
reader, Sexybum +, writes (21 May 2007):
 I agree I wouldn't tell her, for many reasons... You're girlfriend is making the effort and I just don't understand the logic in your friend saying she doesn't like her....
I dis-like a few of my bf's friends but I see that as personal opinion.... If they invite us out I go along... and I talk to them as well as I'm interested to see if I will find common ground with them.. They are not nasty people just wouldn't be my particular choice... I find it interesting that my partner wants to mix with different types of people to me and I'm keen to find out more about them..
One of these friends did turn round and say that they didn't like me... they invited 'us' to a party so we got ready and went to meet them only to find out that I actually wasn't invited!! This really hurt... I've told the guy that he peed me off by doing that... But to be honest I was more angry that he would put my partner in that situation...
Friends don't do that in my opinion... They should make an effort for you
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A
female
reader, cd206 +, writes (21 May 2007):
 I wouldn't say anything. I don't understand the friend's logic of telling you she didn't like your girlfriend at all. Obviously you'd want to tell her. The thing is I think that if you tell her she'll just end up feeling bad and sad and hurt whereas if you don't tell her that's the way you'll feel but sometimes loving someone means taking the punches for them. It's for this girl to tell your girlfriend she doesn't like her and nobody else. Good luck.
CD
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A
female
reader, stina +, writes (21 May 2007):
 Hi there Anonymous,
I would just leave it alone. If your friend decides that she doesn't want to deal with your girlfriend anymore, then she will figure out a way to bring it up. Even if it's something as simple as always being busy when your girlfriend asks your friend out, I'm sure your partner will get the hint after a while.
I have to add that I think it's awful that this person is putting you in the middle. What the heck was the point of telling you that she doesn't like your girlfriend? What was she trying to accomplish? I would make it quite clear to this person that while you respect that she doesn't like your girlfriend, you'd rather not talk about that subject. I have a feeling that talking about it would make you feel even more awkward and could lead to some arguments and hurt feelings in the future.
Take care.
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