A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:my bf said he wanted to try anal sex with a man....it was his fantasy. I said he could try it. now, he says he wants to see the guy twice a month as he needs anal sex. he says I won't be replaced ever but if I want him to stop, tell him now and he will. I refuse to do that. I think he scammed me and took advantage of my kindness so he needs to stop on his own. he is 56 and we have been dating over a year. Am I wrong? should I tell him to stop? I am embarrassed by his behavior and he must be too, as he doesn't want anybody to know.
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male
reader, jackinthebox474  +, writes (28 August 2009):
if you love him enough, go buy a strapon and use it on him. If he really loves you, he will let you use it.
A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 August 2009): Last anon...I suppose there are no ifs or maybes about it, but there are definitely butts involved.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (25 August 2009): You definitely have to let this guy go ...there are no 'ifs' 'buts' or 'maybe's about it.
Good luck
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2009): You could catch a disease from him, like aids....I would dump him..that would be really hard to put up with, I'd feel second best to the other man, just leave him, it's not right that you have to put up with that
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2009): How can you even see his face? Just kick him on the back side and get a life!!!
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2009): Fair enough that we all have our fantasies. I'm not going to judge a man on that. He wants to try riding rough-hood with a another bloke, who am I to say he's wrong for that. Not really my thing, I'm deadly set on the women of this world myself.But having indulged and lived that fantasy out is fine. However, the agreement between you has been reached. He has no right to expect you to let him continue.If he really wants to continue to have his backdoor shenanigans, then its easy enough to buy a strap-on dildo of some kind and ask you to do it for him (as distasteful as this may seem, a lot of guys do this as since its a woman, it does not mean he's gay... just experimental).If he still wishes to get his rocks off with another guy... let him go. It will end up hurting you, because clearly you are not into that kind of a realtionship.You are both at a crossroads. Its time to choose your paths and hope for the best.Flynn 24
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A
female
reader, Goiwan  +, writes (22 August 2009):
 "He doesn't want anybody to know" .......... are you Nobody? That's what he thinks of you and won't respect you...... totally wrong...... and displeasing in the eyes of God if not man.
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A
female
reader, Jayney Y  +, writes (22 August 2009):
 I'm not surprised he doesn't want anyone to know! He's got such hangups about his bisexuality that he even pretends he's resisted the urge to have sex with men until he's 56 years old....... Hands up who believes him..........I sure as hell don't! He expects you to put up with his bi-monthly date-punching sessions? Sheesh!!!
If I was you I'd tell him I was going to take out a two-page spread in the local newspaper announcing his 'fantasy', just to see the expression on hi sface.
Good luck! :)
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A
female
reader, QuirkLady +, writes (22 August 2009):
 The gender of the other person doesn't matter, it's the fact that he wants to bring someone else into your relationship. Let him know that you're aren't interested in an open relationship. Let him know that you want to be exclusively with each other or break up, because you're not interested in sharing him with anyone else.
Good luck.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2009): Hmmm I am a man, but if I were a woman and in your shoes I wouldn't ask him to stop, I'd break up with him immediately.
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A
male
reader, Slapshot +, writes (22 August 2009):
It sounds like your boyfriend has some issues to work through. For goodness sake, think you your health. Don't take the chance of being sexually active with someone you KNOW is sleeping with someone else. Anyone deserves better than that...move on.
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (22 August 2009):
 You've basically just given him permission to cheat. It really doesn't matter what gender, he's started having sex with someone else. It should bother you regardless of gender! It's not like you're allowed one of each. Right now he has his woman (you) and his mistress (the guy). I'd tell him he needs to stop now and have a talk about these fantasies. He could have been repressing that he's actually gay. But either way, you're setting yourself up to have your heart broken.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 August 2009): First of all it sounds to me that he is gay! He seems to want nothing to do with you! But a man what not stick his penis in me after it has been stuck in another mans butt hole! That is discusting and he needs to make up his mind what he really wants! You should ask him, "what do you really want? You either chose me or him it isn't the both of us"!
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