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Should I tell him or wait?

Tagged as: Dating, Love stories<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (22 April 2014) 2 Answers - (Newest, 25 April 2014)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

Hello, My boyfriend and I have know each other for two months now and have been together for one. We are perfect together. I know his the one. I wanted to tell him that I love him. I'm a little scared not because he doesn't feel that same I know he does, it's just I don't know if his ready to tell me he loves me. what should I do? Do I tell him how I feel or wait till he tells me?

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A female reader, Love_is_all_youu_need United Kingdom +, writes (25 April 2014):

Love_is_all_youu_need agony auntIf you're unsure whether to say those big three words, then don't. When the time is right you will know!

In the meantime though, you can SHOW him how you feel. Small, kind gestures go a long way :)

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A reader, anonymous, writes (23 April 2014):

Seeing as you're a woman and women only say "I love you" so we'll say it back I say no, wait a little while. He may not be ready to say it yet.

OP smart guys our age know the "I love you" trap. Women don't say that so we can know how they feel, they say it so they can hear it back and they get crushed when that doesn't happen.

It's like the pillow talk trap "what are you thinking about?" if you say anything other than some variation of "you and how amazing you are" then we're in a world of shit.

"it's just I don't know if his ready to tell me he loves me" see what I mean? You don't care if he knows how you feel, you just want to hear it back. You actually find it scary that it might not be a beautiful movie moment where your trap works.

So just wait. Your movie moment is guaranteed if you wait because he'll say it first and you can then say it back. And hey, it might even happen outside in the rain, just like in the movies.

Sorry to sound so patronising, OP, but you know I;m right. The most important thing here for you is hearing it back, the only reason you won't tell him is in case that doesn't happen because you know you'll be crushed by any other response. So do him and yourself a favour and don't lay that trap in the first place.

I love you, for the first time doesn't need to be planned. It just happens, you're looking into their eyes and it just comes out, and when it does you don't care if they say it back because you truly did just feel right saying it then.

Be patient.

And if he says "football" next time you lay the pillow talk trap, don't crucify him for it, if you don't like the answer don't ask the question.

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