A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:I have a problem with this guy who i used to cam sex with, and he doesn't know that i still like him. Whenever i see him i always feel a certain feeling in my stomach. i don't know if it is butterflies or a stomach. should i tell him how i feel or stay FWBs?? (friends with benefits) Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (10 February 2012): You should tell him, and I would say to also tell him if you guys end up together things willl be different and it won't only be sex.
Be aware that usually BWT are only a sex thing with no emotions attach, meaming dont get youre hopes up either bedside he could just be using you for sex.
If in the end he says he wants nothing more, walk away from it because it will only become harder for you to bare with the situation and you'll feel used.
-Goodluck
A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused  +, writes (9 February 2012):
 NO ONE should have CAM sex or SKYPE sex... just not a prudent thought for ANYONE... as it can be saved and posted online... age does not matter.
Age of consent for sex in the USA varies by state but it's often 16 for girls.... still too young IMO....
here is a list: http://www.webistry.net/jan/consent.html I cannot vouch for it's accuracy however if the girl is under 18 and the man is over 18 it can be dicey....
I do think I need a primer on what the following terms mean to the younger set now:
dating (for me it meant a boy called and took you out did not expect sex just company and fun times maybe a movie or bowling)
going out (meant you were DATING the same boy more than one or two times but still not serious and still NOT sexual)
Going Steady (you were seeing the other person exclusively, you wore his ring or his ID bracelet adn were unavailable to other partners of the opposite sex...eventually you might even have sex with him)
hooking up (not something we did in my dating period but I THINK it means they get together and have sex with no strings attached)
FWB (the nice term for fuck buddies.... you have no shot in hell of having a "real relationship with the person but you get to scratch your itch with a known entity)
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A
female
reader, Miamine  +, writes (9 February 2012):
 Sigh, yes SoVeryConfused.... I missed the Cam thing... and now these young people are confusing me, because they all seem to be doing FWB..... because they don't understand what the term means, they are getting bad advice and insults when the situation they are in could be a lot more innocent than they make it seem.
I'm starting to think that FWB means boyfriend or girlfriend to the young people, and therefore we need to ask more questions to young people who use this term.
The age of consent in most USA states is 18, this girl present as aged 16-17. Any sexual images/nudity of a child below the age of 18 is seen as child pornography and can be tracked by the police and can land the guy in jail for a very long time.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (8 February 2012):
do you really think of CAM sex as FWB?I think part of the problem is that so many younger folks don't understand what FWB means.
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A
female
reader, Miamine +, writes (8 February 2012):
Tell him, and if he can't give you a proper relationship, then get out as fast as possible. There is no place for love or strong feelings in a relationship based only on sex.
You are very silly to sleep with a guy you have strong feelings for but offers you nothing but sex. FWB rarely turn into relationships, they just end up with you getting hurt when he finds a proper girlfriend.
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A
female
reader, Deagan +, writes (8 February 2012):
 I can 99% gaurantee that if you share your feelings to him, the feelings won't be reciprocated.
This isn't the movie Friends With Benefits with Mila Kunis or Justin Timberlake, nor is it No Strings Attached with Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman. Both end with the FWB's falling in love with each other.
Welcome to reality. He was using you. You shouldn't be having FWB at your age.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 February 2012): Tell him how you feel, he may well feel the same and the only way you'll know is if you tell him.
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A
male
reader, Ayan Ganguly  +, writes (8 February 2012):
 Since you feel butterflies in your stomach whenever you see this guy you should better go up to him and disclose him how you feel for him,and if you don't you might still be FWB but he might be going out with someone else and that would be self demeaning.If he does turn you down when you approach him,then from next time onwards show yourself some respect...and if he too has butterflies in his stomach whenever he sees you...then...all the best
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A
female
reader, k_c100 +, writes (8 February 2012):
 Yes you should tell him - you should never be in a FWB if you have feelings for the other person because the whole point of FWB is no strings attached sex, so if you do develop feelings then you defeat the point of a FWB. So tell him how you feel and take it from there.
And next time learn your lesson - if you like a boy dont have a FWB with him because he will see you as cheap and easy, and will never see you as girlfriend material. If you want a guy to respect you and take you seriously, and develop feelings for you as well - never be FWB.
I hope this helps and good luck!
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