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female
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anonymous
writes: i will be 28 and never lived with roomates or anything..the closest thing was my ex and being there a few nights a week. I met someone who is around my age and is having bad luck right now..it's been 5 dates or so but we have been talking for a month whether through text or phone. I have grown to really like him.The new guy is telling me how he made it final and that he has to move back in with his parents at the end of the month. He has a good job but it's just not paying anything right now and he can't do anything about it and is very broke. He said he feels really bad and just wanted to be honest with me about it. He said in time things should change but it's just how the job is at the moment etcI did ask if he wanted to stop seeing each other and he said no but to be honest even the tolls are killing him to drive back and forth to see me. He said we can still see each other etcOne of my girlfriends lives with her b/f who is like family to me. They have a spare bedroom that they have said I can move into part time if I wanted. They know I am close with my family and would be there half the time. I never made the move b/c i felt I was able to save at home, give money to my parents, never had someone special in a few years, and had a routine basically. Maybe this is my time to move out part time with my friend? She is only 15 minutes away. It would be somewhat cheaper rent than normal because she knows me.To be honest..the only reason i would want to move out now is to atleast have that independence of seeing him and having a place to go with him. I don't want us to break up b/c we are both living at home. It would make things VERY rough just to have time alone and we live about 40 minutes apart. I live in a tiny apartment with my parents. We could never be here.It may sound crazy to do this and there is a high chance him and i can break up a week after i move in even but maybe this is the push i need and maybe it's worth it for a year or so? I can always tell my friend it's not working in the future or i need to move out for a bit and save money.I do worry there will still be rules living with her b/c she goes to bed very early etc etcand i also worry we will break up shortly after i make this move regardlessWhat do you think? Is this maybe a sign to make a change in my life??
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female
reader, cmarieky  +, writes (11 July 2012):
Stay put at home with ur parents bc this resonant problems from all angles. If he leaves u then it just wasn't meant to be.
A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (11 July 2012):
 NO NO NO!!! Do not make decisions based on a guy you've had 5 dates with. Never ever ever! Next it'll be that he needs money from you. You do not know this guy, nor should you make these kinds of decisions this impulsively.
That being said, you're 28? Do you work? What is your goal in life? Are you in school and studying?
You must be VERY VERY suspicious about a guy who has a good job, but is flat broke and needs to move back in with his parents. This is not future material, and you are putting yourself at high risk by trying to organize your life around him. You need to concentrate on getting independent yourself. You're living with your parents? Work on becoming self-sufficient. Get a good job, get your own place, build your career. This guy will suck you dry financially, possibly get you pregnant on purpose or because of the same irresponsibility that keeps money sucking through his grasp.
RED FLAGS BIG TIME. 5 dates?? RUN AWAY.
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