A
female
age
30-35,
*pan
writes:I'm having a bit of trouble with a colleague. I thought we got on well, we're the same age, enjoy similar things and spend time together out of work as well.However, he keeps on telling me things other people have said about me. He'll tell me bitchy comments other people have made or when people have slagged me off behind my back. I've told him time and time again not to do it as it's none of his business, but he carries on. Also, whenever he is late for something I cover for him and when he needed to swap shifts to go to a friend's birthday, I agreed to do it. However, when it was my birthday he refused to swap shifts so I could have a day off. Last week, the rota was changed at the last minute when I wasn't in, but instead of telling me, he just text me when I didn't turn up telling me I was late and then phoned our boss to report my absence. He THEN told me that our boss was slagging me off and he was 'just warning' for when I next came in.My boyfriend says I should just ignore him (and my boss), but there's only usually three or four people in and the day can go horribly slowly if you're not talking to anyone and it's hard to avoid/ignore people in such a small team without seeming petty. I feel like I've regressed six years and I'm back in school.Am I mistaken in thinking he was my friend? Should I just ignore him?
View related questions:
my boss, text Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, SonOfMan  +, writes (2 February 2012):
 I would. Some people have nothing better to do with their time than waste it in idle gossip and nonsense. You shouldn't have to put up with it. If there's anyone at work you can speak to then do it, maybe HR, your boss (depending on what he's like) or someone with higher authority.If you say it's affecting your work then they have to do something about it.Otherwise make it clear you're not interested so he gets the point. You can ignore him when he's talking rubbish and just get by with talking if it's to do with work.In most work places, people get bored so just find it amusing to talk rubbish, start rumors or talk about other people. I just keep out of it and get on with my work; only socializing with people who are level headed and constructive.
|
