A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:He said, "I do love you" the other night...in the dark. I took it to mean he's trying to convince himself he loves me. He's already told me he loves just me and his brother. I'm guessing he's not in love with me but he does care and love me - he treats me well and is a shy quiet type. Do I stick around for a while to see if he'll ever love me like his past 2 relationship where he talks about being soooo in love with them? My heart aches, I want him to love me the most. What should I do?
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male
reader, Sageoldguy1465 +, writes (6 October 2011):
 We've seen other such submittals on here.... wherein the inquirer complained that someone didn't love them "enough" or "as much".....
I'm wondering if loving will ever become an Olympic sport and what the rules for it will be.....
A
male
reader, dougbcoll +, writes (6 October 2011):
 it sounds like he loves you from what you wrote. love between two people can grow during a relationship. you are not giving him time to grow closer to you. you say he's the quit and shy type, i am too and being like that it is harder to express your feelings at times and open up to people. if he says he loves you why do you doubt it? the more time you two spend together the more you will see your relationship come to the front.
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A
female
reader, LittleMissWakeUpCall  +, writes (6 October 2011):
 No offence but reading this at first i thought you were a teenager then i realized you were alot older.
If he said he loves you, then whats the big deal? he loves you simple. Maybe your over thinking this.
And you can't expect him to love you more than all the others, everyone has probably had different partners and can say they love them all differently.
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (6 October 2011):
 I think (and I don't mean to offend) that you have a Romance novel sense of love. As in... You are not seeing what you have and you have some rather unrealistic expectations of your man.
It seems to me like you are trying to convince yourself that he doesn't love you, so you can leave him.
You need to look at his actions, not just the words. There is sooo much more to love then just those 3 little words.
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A
female
reader, So_Very_Confused +, writes (6 October 2011):
 "I guess I DO love you" were the BEST words I ever heard in the dark...
You say "I want him to love me the most"... why is that so important? what contest do you win if he loves you the most?
My father loved my mother with a passion that I've never seen before or since. She died 16 years ago. 3 months later he met a woman and he is still with her. He loves her... but he will never love her like he loved my mother. Does that mean he loves her LESS? no. He loves her DIFFERENTLY. He loves her. He's committed to her. She is his life partner now. So why does it matter that he loved my mother first?
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A
male
reader, CaringGuy +, writes (6 October 2011):
To be honest, I think he does love you. On what you've written here, it seems like you might be wanting something that you already have, or that you've not understood him properly and are making this into something that it's not.
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